Predators can never call themselves a survivor. I told that to a ten year former friend when he told me he raped a girl in college. He minimized his actions, I was disgusted with him and told him so.
Google up Willie Nesler if you want to read a tragidy, all because of lack of professional treatment. I have followed the story since day one---I live ten miles from his old home.
When I get a chance I want to contact him, he's in prison, and see if he could use some outside support. Carefully.
It started very early in Aug/2007 that men were somehow contacting me for referral/peer suport and even at my front door in Texas; a lot of first disclosures.
Here I was a mess and people were seeking, even non-victims wanting a copy of my 203 Survivorship Guidelines Series in the long version. I was asked to be part of this areas sex trafficking coalition.
Even while I was homeless for 18 months I almost daily met people at street level with sexual trauma; untreated.
Last October I sat with four men; all with first disclosures at this church/private operated men's home I live at.
It's like God has given me a unwanted blessing and the experience to help others; victims, survivors and the non-victim.
My direction is more with educating non-victims; parents paranoia and their lack of having a plan if sexual abuse occures.
Most parents don't tell their children how to survive the assault and information on post-sexual assault trauma. They don't access info untill post-assault.
The long version of the guidelines put all this information one step in front of the victim.
I recall the day of inspiration in Jul/07, not three weeks into this journey. I thought like Mose's, i told God pick someone else, who do I know I'm a mess. But now just over three and a half years has passed and I'm still a mess at times but like the day before Christmas when a young father asked me for a copy, his five year old son was abused.
These encounters give me a feeling that God gave me a seed and I stashed it away for three decades untill I could plant and harvest it.
In a church last June/10 a woman mentioned my Men_of_HRT/S tatoo on my left forearm, I told her to see me after the Prayer and Praise outside for a cigerette and I'll explain.
I told her w/o details and the guidelines I developed for myself, then converted for others to read. She began to tell me about her own history. I was blown away because she had same sex abuse and exactly the same SSA and sexuality confusion I sufered from. And like myself, she felt hetrosexual.
I still maintain contact and together I helped her remove avoidence issues, identify what I call security barriers and insecurity barracades, flashbacks, sexual reorientation and PTSD remedies for Peace, Understanding and Comfort.
I told my sister its my new job. She knows all of the deal,w/o details, anyway she was expressing some secondary trauma and I referred her to a well known threapist/author at the University of Santa Cruz Ca. My sis lives twenty minutes from there. She asked me how I know these professionals. I said, one step at a time.
Doug>ASA Survivor (1x)
ECV 6001/MaTuCa Chapter 1849
E Clampus Vitus
"What Say the Brethren"
"Hang the Bastards"