***TRIGGER FISH ***
I have been looking for a "pop" answer that will explain it all as to why those four older boys did what they did to me. I went to Amazon and search "children who molest children."
This was also part of my problem. I agree that kind of abuse (by other boys) causes some special problems.
I have declared here in MS that I was subjected to kiddie porn while still 3 and then into 4. I was abused by several other older boys (several years older than me) in the making of that porn. I know the names of all 3 of them and I know where 2 are now. But I don't know much about their lives. One of the related problems is that they were hostile to me and set me up for a lot of feelings of social rejection.
Also the abuse I experienced at the camp at age 12 began with abuse by a bunch of boys the same age or older than I was. All of that was orchestrated by the abuser. I think the abuser knew exactly what he was doing and was setting those things up to emotionally disable me. It really set up some nasty emotional systems. Also then I saw my abuser kill another boy through a sexual act. All of this really set up some nasty psychological problems in me.