Rob,

I have to say again how unbelievably sorry I am for your re-victimization at the hands of your ex-wife. I wish you all possible success in these proceedings!

Kevin

I am so sorry this happened to you, Rob. She is clearly in the wrong and sounds like she has serious issues herself.

I'm sorry if any of this appears to be "venting." Some is probably both venting and a need to understand why I'm sitting in my hovel while my life and spousal support remain vaporized...why accross town my children an she are celebrating my boy's 12th birthday without me...why I dont see the kids again until wednesday after school.

Even though I got to throw him a party here at my place, its not the same as my old life. Nothing is. I have to realize that even if I were there, her support is just not going to happen...no matter what. I need to just shield myself from the rounds of cruelty that get fired my way when things don't go her way.

I still can't fathom how you were forced out of your own house by the police. If she didn't want to be with you, it was her responsibility to leave (unless you were abusing her, which you weren't). How is that even remotely legal????

There is no "law" in Family Court of most states. There are no rules of Civil Procedure...no adherence to case law...etc. It’s the judge and a guardian just doing what seems best at the time.

She and her lawyer originally wrote a 90+ paragraph complaint that truly was 100% speculation and supposition surrounding the historic myths associated with the victimology. So it costs my children an intact home...it cost me $100K++....it gets me alienated by society.

I think the Bible calls it "Baring False Witness."

I hope you find an awesome lawyer. This is just so wrong. How can our legal system allow this to happen with no evidence? What century are we living in?

Rob,
You are a great father and she can't take that away from you. I know you aren't able to be with your kids like you want to but never the less they are very lucky to have a dad like you. It may cost you $200K+ but it is worth every cent if thats what needs to be done to reunite with your kids.

Jason

Rob,
The pain I hear in your words are not the pain of recovery, but the pain of a well adjusted, present and clear man determined to protect his family.

There is no sorrow for you, or pain for your past.

You are simply amazing in your determination to secure your life, your children and make all sacrifices to ensure the quality of life for your family.

You have been through a sickeningly traumatic event, and you have brilliantly maneuvered events for your children, and for your rightful place, them at your side.

"The kingdom of the heavens is like a treasure hidden in the field, which a man found and hid; and for the joy he has he goes and sells what things he has and buys that field."

You have found the "treasure", in your "kingdom" of your children building your stake around and for them, and you have sold "what things you have" and secured it.

Thank you for sharing this,

Sam

Thank you Kevin, Sam and Jason. What kept me going as a child were many petitionary prayers to end things; many things in many sorts of ways. What drove me to the next day was a baseless, blind hope that with enough tomorrows under my feet there would be a path free of pain and shame. I learned to drop fear by the wayside long, long ago, but I never learned to drop the drive for justice and defense.

In the nights when danger was to lurk endlessly, I learned to endure the full night of standing motionless, demanding that my body and floor make no reminding sounds of my presence. I often wondered how horses locked their legs so as to sleep standing-up.

Now I just wonder if I have enough days remaining to see and experience my children's days of rightful happiness. But let me be ever so fucking be clear...they ARE being denied their happy days as children due to simple minds seeking evil's self-centered jollies. God, please let damnation be true!

Robbie,

I hope what I say will be helpful. I have a lot of mixed emotions myself regarding my kids and I's relationship.

I am years older than you and my kids are 24 and 25 now. I left my marriage 20 years ago.

I gave up too soon due to self-esteem issues and not wanting my anger to the get the best of me. By 1992, my ex-wife remarried and her 2nd husband and my ex-wife filed for him to adopt my kids. By this time I lived 1,000 miles away. I was threatened with being arrested if I did NOT sign the papers. My kids want nothing to do with me. They do know the abandonment of me leaving but they have no idea how or why I left. They are kids or were kids.

I say this so you know your not alone. I also say this so you know our situations are somewhat different.

I understand your pain of today as a dad who wants contact with your kids and they deserve a dad like you.

It is horrible that SHE and please remember that is HER that is setting your kids for a lifetime of abandonment. It is HER. NOT you - nor is this your fault.

Take care of yourself,
Donnie

BTW - I am DJsport. I did post you sometime ago. Just wanted to let you know in case you recognized the similarities.