Not in pain or suffering.

Something Traillius posted got me thinking we'd all like to be in that place. Anyway I often get the feeling that my ability to function is used against me by people who w/o ever doing a proper introduction try to assume innapropriate boundary crossing positions with me. They cross examine in a deceptive sideways kind of way to "confirm" for themselves something w/o ever letting me know I'm on trial or whether or not I am found innocent or guilty. The general way I am treated says GUILTY! of what I do not know.

I suppose that may sound paranoid but it does happen. People make assumptions based on rumors and then try me as if what they've heard is fact w/o ever including me or trying to find the truth.

It's like those phoney news items you see about men who allegedly defrauded the work comp system. Most of the video I see tells me nothing, one has to make huge assumptions to get to the place where loading a truck is fraud. I know this because I can do things myself and I know I am in pain when I do them and that I pay a price later on in discomfort and pain that breaks up my sleep and so on. We never hear discussion of these facts of life for the disabled by pain, and likely legitimate possibilities for what we saw when we see these phony reports!
It (the feeling like I'm on trial, and losing.) is like the same thing except on a social level that I am unable to percieve because of my lifelong inability to learn social behaviors. A lot of that is my refusal to accept or adopt a POV that requires lying or is based on misperception which most of the social crap I have run into is.

Hey KidneyThis,

The subject and the first sentence make such sense to me that they ring like a bell.

Everything after that is so oblique that it's hard for me to understand what's going on with you.

So, what's going on with you?

-efm

ditto :-]

I could tell I was losing the thread but I had to try to get it out. One of the abuses was to limit how much language I was exposed to and to never explain anything to me so it would limit my abiloity to express myself. Speech Language therapists call this Aphasia. But its not like I had a stroke I just have no format to compare to by which I can describe what I'm thinking or feeling.

Stil the comparison is apt. The phoney victimization of injured workers by depicting them as frauds is nearly the same sort of thing I am dealing with mostly in professional and medical interactions. I get treated badly based on misperceptions which began as rumors or assumptions about me because of what I look like.
Criminality is second nature to these people and they get away with it seemlessly because most defer to their authority. I do not defer and I question the criminal behavior. This merits severe retribution in their eyes. Thus one thing is that I have to drive several hours to get medical care.