Since I've posted to my blog, facebook and email list, I've had several people open up that they too were abused and shared some of their story with me. I've had some strangers share that as well. While it is heartbreaking to hear, I have always suspected many of them had things happen. If this is happening on a small level for me, just imagine what is going to be set in motion on Nov 5.

I just finished reading the book, "Father's Touch" and wow - it really opened my eyes up a bit more plus gave me a little nudge to not be so afraid (the Oprah show helped give me a little more courage as well).

My hat is off to all of us who have survived to begin breaking the silence. Several years ago, there was no way I wanted anyone to know and now - it doesn't matter to me who knows. Been a long journey to this point - but someone just slipped me into overdrive!

Don

I just got back from doing my interview at the Kc Star and WoW i can not believe i just shared that so openly with out being on a emotional roller coaster it was so cool. the reporter cried several times during the interview and there i sat calm and collected . it was amazing .

i feel like an advocate for the cause spewing statistics and all. I feel like a real difference is being made and it is not all about me it is about the dark cloud that i hovers over male sexual abuse, bringing some sunshine to the topic .

i spoke in front of my church last night and it was also powerful i have told my story before at church but it was always very scared and kind of shaky , not this time it was bold and strong and with out shame . it was straightforward and to the point. feeling very empowered.

i to have read a book called "shattered" and that book hit some key cords with me also . this whole feeling of control and really of an understanding of just how common this is has made the difference. from feeling so alone and isolated to being around so many that this has effected and reading all the post here and the stories here have helped turn my whole life around .

thank every one here and to all that continue to work this thing . there really is hope

i have had the same response even to my video i made people on my friends list of face book have even came forward people i had no clue about and even a family member disclosed some things to me .

i to feel like i am in overdrive and feel like so much good is going to come of this . it is like finally all the hard work is paying off . what a ride this has been .

Wow Nathan... After I wrote this, I got another very heart felt response from someone I don't even know. It brought me to tears. Such a beautiful statement. I truly believe Nov 5 is going to be a life changing moment for many in this world.

And I'm like - I'm ready to do whatever I can to help make a difference in this..

I loved your video.. One of these days, I'm going to do something as well. My book and Oprah was the first step..

So glad you're able to share it with more strength and confidence. Way to go.. and so enjoyed getting to meet you and your wife at the show. It is always great to know the "real person" behind the internet screen.

Don

We're hoping to put an article in our metro newspaper in advance of the Oprah show too.

The question is: what is the most useful information to share?

My experience is this: hearing other men share what is was like being a survivor BEFORE getting help. Hearing and relating to the consequences, the struggles with intimacy, isolation, depression, anger and relationships-THAT is what I needed to hear when I was stumbling in the darkness.

Graphic details of my trauma (while important for my individual recovery) only separate me in a public forum. what I share with other survivors ismmost important.

So ask yourself-what do these people outside in the real world -where secrets are long buried and men struggle in silence alone and afraid-what truth about my story can I share that is helpful?

A very close friend of mine who was at the show just called to inform me that he will be meeting with a reporter Wednesday from his local paper. He said they seemed eager to do this in conjunction with the airing of the upcoming shows. My hat is off to those that go public in their own home towns. One thing to do it on T.V., another to do it where your friends and neighbors are even more likely to see it!

here again is my first that broke in my hometown;

http://www.thenorthwestern.com/article/2...bout-abused-men

Tomorrow it breaks in Appleton WI, then I am holding off till after the elections.

To those that can't go public, it's ok, give me a hug when we meet!

Kevin,
More press is a good thing. Not to attack you but constructive criticism...it is perps we want exposed, not the victims. We want to get help for the victims. Otherwise it is good that people hear. In the 80s, psych texts defined abuse as what a man does to girls. We are moving in the right direction.

congrats to all of you who participated - i just got the MS email about the show. :-) how times change ey? i still have the letter from oprah's producers in 1988 saying that they were not interested in discussing male sexual abuse.

i don't have tv but i guess the show will find its way online at some point (legally or not lol.)

YES!!!!!

It's just the greatest thing to hear of the guys here speaking out, giving interviews, talking to groups, ditching all the shame completely and for good.

It's like a little movement is starting of survivors speaking out about how this stuff has just GOT TO STOP.



Well? Well??? What do you say???

I just got interviewed by the Orlando Sentinel this morning and the article is up on their site.

http://blogs.orlandosentinel.com/enterta...-survivors.html

I was so nervous because I've never done this before but glad i got the experience.

Awesome sharing, Don!

An inspiration.

Thank you,
Sam

cool man great job , glad to see you being a light for others to see !! in this dark world

Thanks guys... just got interviewed by the Daytona Beach newspaper and this one was an in-depth interview. Break the silence!

Keep up the great work Don!
John+

Here is my friend's story. I am proud of him. Now if we could just gel all of this together, all the media focus on this issue. I am amazed at what I have read, beginning with Donald's piece in his paper.

http://www.presstelegram.com/news/ci_16516958

Here's team Minnesota on the local news. It's short little clips, but I thought it wasn't bad.

Here's team Minnesota on the local station news. here
Allan

Awesome clip Allan - wish I could have been there with you all

Hi

Here's the link to the show

200 Adult Men Speak Out

Thanks Steve for the link. Good to see some faces I recognize in the audience. I hope that others come out of the shadows and break the silence to tell their story.

Andy

The show was one of the most inspiring things I have ever seen in my life. I went from room to room at work to find a tv but the ones that did not have staff in them would not work properly. In frustration I finally used one that had a staff member who was in and out of it the room. I hid my tears and was able to talk when he made a comment. I did not know he used to work with Indian Child Welfare so he could very much relate to the topic.

Moving beyond words.


Daryl

Allan,

Thanks for posting the link.

TJ Jeff,

I missed meeting you. I was there - I am in the white pants, tan shirt and cowboy boots - but was NOT interviewed.

It is an honor and joyous to be one of the "team Minnesota". Allan got the team to be seen and heard locally as he made contact with the local TV station and he got them to move there viewing of us to a more central location so all of us had the opportunity to be seen.

Team Minnesota consists of at least a couple dozen men who have been a group session.

Donnie

messed up the post reposted

got this in my email first thing this morning , this came from a guy that i use his trucking company to move some of the freight at my job as i am a shipping manager. it is a blessing and an honor that he felt that he could tell some one this for the first time . i have only met this guy one time and i think that this is so cool this is really working guys , this is the 3rd time some one has opened up to me about abuse . mission is being accomplished .










Good Morning Nathan
Marcy forwarded me your article from the Kansas City paper. I salute your courage for coming forward. Very compelling story.
There are tons of kids that get abused.....I have never told anyone but I was the younger of neighborhood kids and had my moments too. It never really bothered me because it was just a 10 year old boy and it only happened once...still , it's my little dark secret---I am sure your courage and the show will help others deal with their feelings of shame over abuse.
Take care my friend.

So many will have the courage to stand up and face these dark secrets. It was worth the emotional rollercoaster I experienced to do this. That's so awesome Nathan. There is no better gift we can give ourselves than becoming more conscious and aware in freedom.

This show was the topic of conversation at the Thanksgiving dinner I was at today.

My experience of "running" from family in shame is over. I can talk freely about the affects from the abuse.

I asked one of gals that was there if she had seen the Oprah show. That was the beginning of a 3 hr conversation. There was one woman and 5 men present.

I give myself and all who want to talk about this the power.

I was shaking - really physically shaking. I just took slow deep breaths. I was the one who was asked questions of. I did not go into details just talked about the awful feelings.

I stated the show for me was about "no more shame". I stated this my stomach was churning and the muscles in my body tensed up.

I made a fool of myself. I opened my big mouth. I go back and forth - do I tell or don''t I. I feel like crap.

Donnie

You were brave to speak out, Donnie. I think you do yourself a disservice to sell that bravery so short. We make the world we want real by creating it one statement and one act at a time.

It's also an act of hope and that is pretty damned great in my book.

-efm

EFM,

I am not sure why I felt so "terrible" - less than the rest of the group.

Does anyone go through as they share more publicly?

Donnie

I will just keep my mouth shut next time.

I was there fear that some child would not be reached made me go. I felt vulnerable and comforted then. Opened up all my wounds but worth it to try to make a difference. Kept quiet for 38 years in shame that was misplaced in blame that was misplaced. I am still an open wound that is healing myself with resources online and Private therapy. Starting a peer to peer group here in Cambridge is my effort to give back after recieving such a gift from Oprah. Also an Admin on Facebook Oprah's Echo. I want to give back. People have opened up to me about their own csa since Oprah one I met looking for a location for the group I am starting.