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#343275 - 10/27/10 12:27 PM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: kb8715]
wayne9 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 161
Loc: alabama
I have something I want to say here. First of I want to apologize for anything that might seem hurtful of judgmental because that is not what I am trying to do.

I was raised in a Christian family. I have been taught all my life the gay lifestyle is sinful. I understand why this is taught. God created Adam…….he then created Eve that man would not be alone. He meant it to be this way. I understand that God did not intend for man to be with man or women to be with women. All this I know and understand………

Now for what I don’t understand…..

Where do I stand as far as God is concerned? I know that I am more attracted to men than women. I know that if all things were the same as far as God and society was concerned that I would probably be in a same sex relationship. These things I KNOW about myself. Others do not! Is it because of the CSA that I experienced during my childhood years (8-12 years old). Is it because something didn’t form in my brain the same way it does in a normal boys mind. Which every the case, I know the outcome of it. I’ve known it for 30-40 years.
I have asked God for help so many times but things remain the same. I sit in Church services and feel so much guilt for these thoughts and desires I have inside. The distress of knowing there are so many Christian friends sitting in the same service that have no idea about this part of my life and who would not understand seems to get worse as time goes on. Where do I get peace from all the turmoil inside……..


Tim





Edited by wayne9 (10/27/10 12:30 PM)

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#343284 - 10/27/10 01:27 PM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: wayne9]
nltsaved Offline


Registered: 08/26/08
Posts: 856
Loc: Kc,Mo
God cares and understands us all . you have a heart for him that is all he asked for do not worry about all the other stuff let go and let God worry about all of the other stuff . keep working this thing .

he loves you just the way you are he made you just the way he wanted stop focusing on yourself i hate to say it but this life is not all about us anyway .

it is about God working in and through us to build the kindom of God . everything seems to work itself out doing this . to much thinking about what others think and what others around us are doing and feeling .

be the light that God created you to be for others to see . stop condiming yourself for how God made you after all he made you right .

do you not think he knew what he was doing when he made you ?
he knew what he was doing and he knows your heart that is what matters. not anything else .

find peace knowing that the God of the universe made you perfect just the way he wanted to make you and that weather you feel you are gay or not he still loves you . as long as you are living your life for him than all the other stuff tends to work itself out and the focust shifts from you to him and his plan .

and just because others around you yes even in the church might look down on you EVEN THO THEY HAVE THIER OWN ISSUES and are not expressing them out loud , just know every one is dealing with something or some things and just because this issue has been pounded into everyones head like it is the only thing going on in the church and every where else does not make it any worse than other things.

it is not the feelings you are having that is the problem i am sure lots of people feel the same thing even if it is not for the same sex they still want to do things and think of things that are not pleasing to God but no one is talking about that now are they . so stop feeling so condemed when people every were are thinking the same things just in a differnt manner and they are no worse of than you.

we serve a perfect and holy God so all this is sin to him that is why Jesus came to take the sin from us and put it on himself because he knew that NONE are capable of being sinless . But Through Jesus Christ we are worthy .

he took all sin to the cross yes even this so called homosexuality . so give yourself a break

he died for you to have peace so have peace

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWgeUrD4MHI




Edited by nltsaved (10/27/10 03:10 PM)
Edit Reason: added link
_________________________
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Video of me telling my story
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#343310 - 10/27/10 06:42 PM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: nltsaved]
prisonerID Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/17/08
Posts: 1247
Loc: Oklahoma
smile

_________________________
Broad statements often miss their true mark.

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#343311 - 10/27/10 06:47 PM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: prisonerID]
blaidd Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/01/00
Posts: 240
Loc: Australia
Trying to bite my tongue... So I don't say something I will regret.

There is no excuse for vilifying gay people, no matter what you think the justification is.

_________________________
Blaidd (pronounced as blaith/blithe) is a welsh word meaning wolf.

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#343322 - 10/27/10 07:45 PM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: blaidd]
Tinman Offline


Registered: 05/30/08
Posts: 359
Loc: Lake Forest, CA
Gonna be blunt here, and do not mean to belittle any of the heartfelt answers given in response to my original question. I honor and validate your desire to help me.

I may be understanding this a little better. There are Christians who will not condemn me for being gay. As long as I don't act on it. Of course, all of them are straight.

So, that means that I have to be OK with the idea there can never be someone special in my life. And please don't tell me I can fill it with friends. When was the last time you whispered your deepest darkest secrets to someone who was not dedicated to you and only you? When was the last time you could come home to these people after a hard day and just be looking for a kiss and a hug. Never happens!

So, I am to spend the rest of my days heartbroken because I cannot have someone in my life when what I am was not a choice? And, please, my straight brothers, don't say it's a choice. When did you look at it and say "Hmmm, Boys or girls?? Today, I think I will choose girls!" I am not talking about those who are sexually confused, but those of you who have always been straight. You didn't make that choice, so please do not tell me I did. The only ones who run around stating it is a choice are straight people. Excuse me, but when did they become mind-readers?

I am not saying where I am going with the things I mentioned earlier in the original post. It's just that my thoughts of the last paragraph are getting clearer.

Because I think I am leaning to the idea of a God who created me to live in loneliness may not be one I want to have anything to do with.


_________________________
Tinman
"I finally have my heart!"

To the perps: Don't worry about me coming after you. But you damn well better watch out for God! "Vengeance is mine", saith the Lord

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#343325 - 10/27/10 08:05 PM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: Tinman]
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16265
Tinman,

I like your thoughts above. Something I have thought of often is that maybe, just maybe, the God some believe in isn't the same one I do. I have struggled at times trying to reconcile the two then it will dawn on me for the umpteenth time that I don't have to because I believe in a God that loves everyone regardless of race, creed, nationality, religion, culture, color, gender, or sexual identity.

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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#343327 - 10/27/10 08:25 PM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: WalkingSouth]
prisonerID Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/17/08
Posts: 1247
Loc: Oklahoma
I found a lot of freedom when I began asking myself questions about my own beliefs. I have kept many but let some go by the wayside. Just because I was taught something does not mean it is correct.

I do not plan on spending my life alone. And I do not believe that I have to as a gay man. That is my belief system.

_________________________
Broad statements often miss their true mark.

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#343384 - 10/28/10 06:55 AM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: prisonerID]
sono Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/19/09
Posts: 1069
Originally Posted By: tinman
There are Christians who will not condemn me for being gay. As long as I don't act on it. Of course, all of them are straight.


Tinman,

This is what I meant above. Why not align yourself with those who will "approve" of you as you are and not those who would have you fit in their box. For what's it worth consider the inordinate number of Christian men who talk about the evils of homosexual acts while meeting up with other guys at rest stops or airport bathrooms. I think there might have been a few Larry Craigs and Ted Haggards writing the bible...maybe even a few of them leading the very church you're speaking of here...just a thought.

Go enjoy yourself and have a life.


Kevin (non-religious straight guy)

_________________________
the family
the perp

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#343390 - 10/28/10 08:26 AM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: sono]
wayne9 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 161
Loc: alabama
Tinman, I hope that you or know one else here thought that I was saying anything negative to you or about you. I was simply saying that I am in the same situation. I am just having a hard time dealing with it. The loneliness of spending the rest of my life alone because of what has been pounded into my head about whats right or wrong. I am not saying it is the truth.....just saying its hard to go against something I have been taught all my life.

Tim



Edited by wayne9 (10/28/10 08:27 AM)

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#343395 - 10/28/10 09:16 AM Re: Christian and Gay? [Re: wayne9]
Tinman Offline


Registered: 05/30/08
Posts: 359
Loc: Lake Forest, CA
Tim,

Brother, my response here was not directed at anybody. Just a statement of where I am right now.

I think that everybody who responded did so out of compassion and caring. I cannot detect a single mean-spirited word in the responses.

_________________________
Tinman
"I finally have my heart!"

To the perps: Don't worry about me coming after you. But you damn well better watch out for God! "Vengeance is mine", saith the Lord

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