That was fast even by on-line standards, lol.
Perhaps this is kind of a "teachable moment". I know some of you are skeptical, distrustful, fearful about the results of this Oprah experience and resulting show.
But I feel very "heard" and respected by all that I've seen in participating in this. Trust of others, especially authority, can be very difficult or even absent and unknown entirely in survivor's lives. As I see it though, these people, this production are entirely worthy of that trust.
In learning to trust, I first came to realize, I've never trusted at all. I realized I didn't know what trust was, because I never felt safe growing up. Every adult was potentially harmful to me, and I never let down my guard. My parents were very unpredictable and frequently completely oblivious to even physical, sexual abuses.
MUCH later in recovery, I trusted a bit but the slightest error by someone would completely undo that trust, even after a year of "trustworthiness", and I'd be deeply, silently suspicious for a month or more. Usually, I didn't say anything about being hurt because I couldn't believe anyone was safe. This isn't trust either.
I've learned people you trust WILL do things that hurt you. People make mistakes. But you have to clearly tell them, and the response to that is what matters. Some people will give you their full attention and want to know what they can do to correct the hurtful action. Tell them that too, don't retreat for self protection. Give them the chance to restore trust.
No matter what they do, I'm safe now. I withdraw trust from people who repeatedly hurt me and don't care. I didn't learn that as a kid, repeatedly trusting my parents and getting hurt over and over. Learning to DIStrust untrustworthy people has been really important to me as well.
I'm going to be blunt now. Own up to your own issues here around trust. You're not a little kid any more. You can take care of yourself now and not be vulnerable to being victimized all the time. Constant mistrust is self fullfilling when you don't recognize there are people around you who want to help you. Help them to help you!!! They're not mind readers or miracle workers. They just have issues and problems too, but they're not evil SOB's. And of course, correctly recognize and protect yourself from the ones who ARE evil SOB's. But they are fairly rare.
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you