My husband recently told me that he was abused by a male babysitter at 4 or 5 and again by female cousins at 9 or 10.
We are gong through a difficult time right now, he recently had an affair after a long depression and we are working things out. After he told me about the affair, he told me about this abuse. Not as an excuse for his actions, but it has been coming up for him. The abuse also led to seeking sexual attention and other sexual issues in his teenage years which has caused him a lot of guilt and humiliation which brought him close to suicide right before the affair. He is currently in therapy and doing EMDR for general issues (because he doesn't feel much about the abuse currently).
I want to be there for him. Im don't know anything about male sexual abuse and Im not sure where to start. So far he says that he doesn't feel anything about it, mostly just guilty for his own sexual acting out. He suffers from depression, ADD and has just been feeling terribly stuck. I also was abused as a kid and have been working through that for many years, so I understand the shame and confusion.
I would appreciate any help, advice, links and book suggestions.