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#339272 - 08/30/10 07:15 PM I Have A Question. . .
Marinan Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/03/07
Posts: 330
Is 15 considered an adult in this category?


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#339273 - 08/30/10 07:24 PM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: Marinan]
earlybird Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/17/10
Posts: 1007
Loc: WA USA
I was eighteen and considered myself an adult. I would say that the issues you are facing are far closer to those of an ASA than a CSA. So I believe you are. EB

_________________________
Balanced (My goal)

There is symmetry
In self-reflection
Life exemplified
Grace personified

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#339275 - 08/30/10 08:05 PM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: earlybird]
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11150
Loc: Denver, CO
I'm not sure where we draw that magic line guys. I want to say it's more in terms of not being a minor, not to negate the severity or importance of recognizing abuse at any age. Personally, I did not consider myself an adult at 15. I barely considered myself one at 19, legal definition aside.

_________________________
List of things ain't nobody got time for:

1. That


If I could meet myself as a boy...

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#339276 - 08/30/10 08:56 PM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: FormerTexan]
CruxFidelis Offline


Registered: 06/16/10
Posts: 486
Loc: NJ
I guess you have to ask the question, what is childhood and what is adulthood? Is there some sort of magical line we can draw between the two? In modern times, we have the gray area known as adolescence...that time where you're still figuring yourself out but you haven't taken a clear path yet in terms of life decisions and goals. Maybe the language we're using about sexual abuse isn't big enough to describe the wide variety of experiences people have. At 15, you were probably still living with your parents and in school, but for most guys 15 is considered post-pubescent.

My wife was raped at 13. She says that before she was raped, she considered herself a young girl, and afterwards, she thought about herself as a woman. She found herself worried about possibly being pregnant and scared about becoming a mother at such a young age. She never got pregnant but it was a very adult situation she was faced with, and she says it made her an adult really early on.

_________________________
“If a man wishes to be sure of the road he treads on, he must close his eyes and walk in the dark.”

- Saint John of the Cross

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#339277 - 08/30/10 09:03 PM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: CruxFidelis]
earlybird Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/17/10
Posts: 1007
Loc: WA USA
Crux,

I'm sorry about your wife. Of course this is an awful thing for her. But your point is well made. She was facing very adult issues after her rape, so her needs and situation would emulate an adult far more than that of a child.

_________________________
Balanced (My goal)

There is symmetry
In self-reflection
Life exemplified
Grace personified

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#339336 - 08/31/10 08:32 PM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: earlybird]
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16265
Adult in this case is considered to be age 18 and over.

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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#339371 - 09/01/10 06:24 AM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: WalkingSouth]
frozen Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/26/07
Posts: 22
Loc: Europe
Hi

I was 14,when my third perp started.I was 25,when last rape happend.I still felt like kid, his power over me was too overwhelming. I am 42 now,despite meds and shrink,it is still difficult to handle.


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#339404 - 09/01/10 02:58 PM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: frozen]
prisonerID Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/17/08
Posts: 1247
Loc: Oklahoma
frozen,

I am sorry for all you have gone through. I think you handle aptly describes how we get stuck at the ages of our abuse and assaults. I know for myself concerning my assault, at age 29, I have aged very slowly in my mind. I just turned 50 and yet feel like I might be in mid thirties.

I can see why the adult assault would take you back to when you were abused as a child. It is something we have to keep working at and it is not an easy thing.


Daryl

_________________________
Broad statements often miss their true mark.

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#339701 - 09/06/10 12:22 AM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: prisonerID]
brother2none Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/30/09
Posts: 267
Loc: Undisclosed
Regardless of the age I was at any point in time of some abuse happening to me.... age 7, age 14-18, age 20, age 45..... in all instances I froze, and was unable to fight back. This is what sticks out to me, not so much the age.


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#339703 - 09/06/10 02:08 AM Re: I Have A Question. . . [Re: Marinan]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Originally Posted By: Marinan
Is 15 considered an adult in this category?


Guys who are 15 would usually see pediatricians for physical ailments. I think that by parallel reasoning, guys who get abused at 15 would still be best advised by a child specialist.

Allen

pufferfish


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