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#330751 - 05/02/10 08:03 PM Re: Showering in a Men's Locker room [Re: usmc97]
Elad 12 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/15/05
Posts: 1176
Loc: on the coast
Bobcat,

I found your last post interesting and positive. As you know from my posts elsewhere, I don't have a problem with being naked around anyone. I haven't always felt that way. But by letting myself experience being naked with others in showers and other places I have been able to loose a lot of the shame I carried. I am personally sorry to see more and more shower stalls and to hear that kids don't even shower at school anymore. Not because I like to see other guys naked but because it is very shame reducing in my opinion. I understand why people (particularly survivors) may not want their kids undressing around others, but to me that just has a way of creating an atmosphere of shame. The more you hide your body, the more ashamed you feel of it.
I do agree with you though. I don't think the WoR will ever include a nude showering workshop smile

Dale


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#333196 - 06/07/10 02:09 PM Re: Showering in a Men's Locker room [Re: Trucker51]
Sobernow Offline


Registered: 05/17/10
Posts: 256
Loc: Oklahoma
I am 51yo --- spent most of my life afraid of public restrooms -- would rather pee outside or somewhere - than to go inside a public men's room (empty or occupied).

I fear being shot, knifed, robbed, attacked.


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#333242 - 06/07/10 11:58 PM Re: Showering in a Men's Locker room [Re: Sobernow]
Anomalous Offline
Greeter Coordinator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 03/07/10
Posts: 1346
Absolutely NO public showering for me!!!

I was just thinking about the bathroom at college. Though there were individual shower stalls, they only had a shower curtain and not a door with a lock. I was always afraid that someone would see me.

When I was in middle school we had to shower one year. I was terrified and didn't want to, but had no choice. Then I found that there was a shower stall and I always tried to get that one. I don't remember if the showering lasted all year. I just remember trying to get out of showering. It was difficult enough just having to change clothes in front of others.

It doesn't matter if I have been in shape or out of shape. I refuse to publicly shower, or change. I had joined a gym once, and have thought about it again, but can't bear the thought of the locker room.

Yes, I would be the one wearing wet swim trunks under my jeans.


Anomalous

_________________________
Acceptance on someone else's terms is worse than rejection.

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#333296 - 06/08/10 04:27 PM Re: Showering in a Men's Locker room [Re: Anomalous]
KingFred Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/23/10
Posts: 57
Loc: West Coast, USA
I haven't showered with anybody else since I was like nine or ten (and even then, I remember saying that I didn't want to shower with them (two of my older brothers)).
I am ashamed of my body (morbidly obese from "swallowing too much aggression...and too many pizzas" (bonus points if you caught the movie referance) when I was growing up). I won't deny that. But part of my abuse was also in the shower/bath. If it weren't for this, I'd feel WAY more comfortable taking showers "in public."

_________________________
Not particularly a fan of hugs. High fives and well wishes are always appreciated though.

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#333393 - 06/09/10 07:48 PM Re: Showering in a Men's Locker room [Re: Survivinguy]
Obi Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/28/09
Posts: 1331
Loc: kansas
i was always worried about having to take showers in the gym class and so on. i lucked out that i had gym the last class of the day and went home to get cleaned up.

i only showered once in a men's locker room. it was in '99. i was up in thermopolis, wyoming. they had a small water park there that used the hot springs up that way. i took a quick shower, still in my bathing suit. however, i still had to change into dry clothes. so, after a few deep breaths i took my suit off and got changed into dry clothes in front of other men, some dressed and some naked...

that actually ended up being somewhat liberating for me... i was terrified the whole time, felt less than a man but at the same time i felt some freedom there...

i think that if i had to shower in a public locker room again i think i could do it and not have as much anxiety as i did the first time...

todd

_________________________
live another day. climb a little higher.

my story

my vlog

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#335016 - 07/01/10 09:36 AM Re: Showering in a Men's Locker room [Re: Obi]
BK Offline


Registered: 07/01/10
Posts: 1
In 7th grade I was shocked to learn we would be showering with other guys after gym. I had always been on the heavy side, hated playing shirts vs skins too.

I made it thru this class by being the first one in and out of the shower. While all the other guys were in the shower I was already finished and dressing. This actually created more privacy for me.

Placing my towel around my waist ASAP and beginning to dress with towel in place helped too.

In high school I had had enough of showering and did not choose PE when it became an option. In the end I had put it off too long and was forced to take PE. Hated it so much that I quit school. I was a B student and on the school newspaper staff at the time but just could not cope with PE being overweight, always getting picked last and then showers. I later got my GED.

Over the years I've lost weight and when I go to the Y to swim I don't mind taking showers with other naked men in an open shower area. I think it's masculine. To me it is facing my fears from long ago and I see how far I have come from those days.

I've taught my children about eating right and exercising; we have open communication too. I think had I been able to talk to my Dad knowing he would help me by drawing up a diet or exercise plan and doing it with me, my high school years would have been much better.


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#339187 - 08/29/10 03:11 PM Re: Showering in a Men's Locker room [Re: BK]
lfp Offline


Registered: 11/02/08
Posts: 121
This is a very good topic. I hate the gym, not only because i get tired and it hurts but bc of the whole showering and locker room thing.

When I'm in the locker room I have a LOT of things in my mind, questions, fears, I challenge myself. It takes a lot of emotional energy to be there. Eventually, I just get exhausted and I need to get out.

I showered once in the gym, but it wasn't easy at all.

_________________________
Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there. ~Josh Billings.
The Round Table, Mondays 7:30pm CST.

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