I saw this morning that someone had posted a link to a song that I really like. It is Bonnie Rait's "I Can't Make You Love Me". This song has always brought on a little melancholy for me for several reasons. One reason being gay I have never felt completely accepted by many in my family and others. Another reason being that since my assault I have felt out of sync with others - especially in various relationships.

For some reason I saw the song differently. It is true I cannot force acceptance from another concerning my sexuality. And I cannot squeeze understanding from those who believe men cannot be raped.

But the sword cuts both ways. I have freedom and liberty in who I allow in my life and I can reserve my love for those who would offer positve rather than negative influence for me.

This is my body. No one else's. When I got my first tattoo it was my declaration that this body belonged to me again. I guess you could say I branded myself. The symbol meant friend and I was referring to me and not another person. After years of warring with myself I was seeking peace with my past self - the one who was assaulted. I am still working on that.

This morning I sang "you can't make me love you if I don't, you can't make my heart feel something it won't". I do not think I have ever sounded better.


Daryl

Thanks for making me smile.