Dear F & F,
My BF and I crossed a threshold last month, at least figuratively: we got married!
It was a challenging decision to make for both of us, subject to a great deal of reflection and discussion, and it was probably not a sure thing until about a month before it happened. Those of you who have seen my posts for the past couple of years might have some idea why it was such a daunting step to take...though it's still difficult, of course, to explain fully to anyone outside how well the relationship is working for the people involved.
But all in all, it seemed the right next step for both of us. We've done a helluva lot of work separately and jointly, in therapy and in 12-step programs; we have a much easier pace of our daily life; we have vastly improved communication and trust. So we did it! We had a wonderful ceremony and party, and a lovely honeymoon to boot. All of this, by the way, was a jointly-managed project, I am pleased to say--pretty evenly divided in terms of tasks and time needed from each of us to do them.
We are very much enjoying our married state and hoping that we'll be able to maintain the excitement of newlyweds for the indefinite future. We do seem to understand what exactly is at stake for us both.
Anyway, for perfectly understandable reasons we on the F & F forum tend to talk about our problems much more than our satisfactions. In the spirit of full disclosure, I wanted to share our good news and to say thank you to everyone here. This site and the people on it did help us reach the place where we could sincerely make a commitment to each other without hedging our bets.
I'm just a poor wayfaring stranger, a million miles away from home.