It must be pretty tough to watch someone whom you love deeply, spurn your love, unintentionaly.
He, is probably into the depths of his soul & hell too, in starting to come to terms with his CSA.
I know that when, this hit me, i was deep into myself, the confusion, the guilt & shame consumed all my time. I wanted to be in the dark, where my wife couldn't see my pain & tears. But, when the daylight came, i was hell on earth to her in my emotions toward her. She was at the brunt of my anger. I wanted to be alone & somewhere where nobody could see me trembling, yes even crying.
He is probably in the same position right now. I'm sure that when he stsrts coming around, he will see & appreciate, that you have been there, for him. Giving him all the compassion, understanding & love, that you posess.
So, Pattycakes, hang in there. He will need all the help that he can get. He will see a caring & compassionate woman that you are.
I wish you well. Take care of yourself too.
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.