Its hard to say. My brother initially dealt with our abuse much better than me. As time wore on he himself became abusive and a drunk/druggie. I never became abusive. My brother abused me. I withdrew mostly into Star Trek, Star Wars and fiction reading. I was an alcoholic as a teen but had a religious conversion. While never perfect, I gave up alcohol and drugs, changed my friends and started to blossom. My brother became a drunk his whole life, finally killing himself when he feared prosecution for sexual intercourse (rape) with a 7yo girl as a victim. I served in the US Army with an honorable discharge, got a bachelor's degree and a graduate degree, held respectable jobs (never more than 3 years however), started a business and got a respectable job here recently w/o much trouble.
I don't know how to read that whole thing. What was different? My dad molested us and others, but it never seemed to be a violent experience. My uncle, being a vietnam/korean war vet, literally raped, tortured and brainwashed us. What is the difference in those brothers?
God grant me
The Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.