When I was in a behavior health hospital many years ago, my first psychologist said exactly that!!! We get stuck emotionally at the age of our first abuse. I believe that, because my mind that very first time took me somewhere else. Somewhere I thought was safe. This wasn't really really happening to me, and this adult I was to respect and admire wouldn't betray me this way.
Until I got help!!! I was always emotionally like a 9 year old!! My body grew, but my emotions did not. In my recovery my emotions caught up with my body and age. From the time of my first abuse to the time of the beginning of my recovery, my mind always needed that safe place, I created for myself back then. Turned out it wasn't so safe. Not as an adult at any rate. I don't need that place anymore and it is such a relief!!!
If you want to be truely free!! You must learn to LOVE, and FORGIVE!! You can't have one without the other