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#333667 - 06/13/10 05:43 PM 16 year old sailing around the world alone?
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
Is it just me or is 16 too young to be sailing the around the world alone? While I don't doubt her skills as a sailor, rather it is a matter of being able to assess risk carefully and evenly, which I think at 16 one cannot do like an adult would due to lack of life experience. More importantly, a teen's brain is not fully developed at that age which can result in poor decision making and impulse control problems. Even the need for more sleep is necessary at that age in order to function properly and I can't imagine that as a 16 year old girl she was getting the rest she needed in that situation. Sailing alone around the world demands limited periods of sleep over a long period of time due to ever changing weather conditions. One needs to be alert and ready at all times in order to prepare for every eventuality, which again undoubtedly left her physically disadvantaged for the challenges of such a voyage. When it comes to kids and acceptable risks where do we draw the line? By comparison, is there any difference between allowing your minor child to sail around the world alone and leaving a five year old at home by him or herself for the day? In some ways I think not, considering what could happen. Whats ironic is that anyone reading this post who knew me at 16 would be rightfully calling me a hypocrite since at that age I thought I knew it all and could do anything an adult could do without considering the consequences. However, my response to this would be that given some of what I went through in my teens Im just happy to be alive to accept such criticism. JS

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Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And well change the world.


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#333678 - 06/13/10 08:54 PM Re: 16 year old sailing around the world alone? [Re: jls]
kidneythis Offline


Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 1558
Here's my outlook on it. To start I'm jealous of her and her brother for having such a great family.

Over the years I've been lucky enough to meet and hang out with the mythical Normal Family on a couple of different occasions. In these strang environs it seems children flourish and learn and are not rash, impulsive, stupid or prone to getting into trouble. I found they were trusted and responded to this by being responsible and open with their parents.
The thing that stands out about all the kids of these families is that they were doing things I never have or didn't until I was over thirty. I felt rather immature and underdeveloped next to these teens who were as good at these things as I would expect an adult to be. This includes sailing, motorcycles, bicycling, and a host of other sports most of which I never got near.
These kids also had a better education and a broader not quite experience of the world but knowledged of what was out there than I did right then as an adult.

I don't think its as hazzardous as you suggest and her mental and physical abilities I'm sure were well upo to it. After all she had her brother who did it a year before to coach her and advise her. It was only an accident that prevented her form completing. she could have easily survived weeks out there if it took that long.

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As Mark Twain once quipped, history may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

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#334037 - 06/18/10 04:09 AM Re: 16 year old sailing around the world alone? [Re: kidneythis]
Brian Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 05/03/01
Posts: 1563
Loc: Upstate NY
jls,

I couldn't agree with you more! I can't imagine what her parents were thinking. Most parents are nervous about letting their 16 year old daughters go on a date. IMHO, this is kind of like allowing your 16 year old daughter to spend a long weekend on a tropical island with Jordan van der Slooth! I don't care how mature she is, how much she wants to do it or even if she knows kung fu, sometimes parents just need to use some common sense.

While I understand what kidneythis is saying about being part of a supportive family (wouldn't that have been nice), I think we as CSA survivors tend to give other kids or people our own age more credit that they deserve due to our own low sense of self. It's so easy for us to believe that others are so competent and/or talented and that we are so damaged and helpless. In my 10 years of recovery, the biggest lesson I have learned is that this "lack of belief in ourselves" is biggest obstacle that we must overcome to really start living our lives. I still struggle with it sometimes, but have played with this concept enough to know it's true.

My tag line is "Recovery is Possible" and it really is! You just gotta believe!

Brian

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#334038 - 06/18/10 04:34 AM Re: 16 year old sailing around the world alone? [Re: kidneythis]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
I hear what you are saying. I had a debate with a friend who said what's the difference between this and allowing him to ride dirt bikes or snowmobiles at age nine so I understood his point. However, he was supervised by parents while doing so and not on his own 6000 miles away from help so this is my issue.

_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And well change the world.


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#334053 - 06/18/10 09:27 AM Re: 16 year old sailing around the world alone? [Re: jls]
kidneythis Offline


Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 1558
She wasn't so alone and she had taken all the precautions necessary. I think it is a perspective and personal preference thing that you wouldn't allow it as opposed to her parents allowing it. I don't think this perspective is much different form the choice to live in earthquake prone areas ro not to live in such a place. In my time living in ca I found people who wanted to live life fully and do things and take risks to follow their dreams rather than relying on the fear of a negative to make the decision for them. That is life after all. Those who do great things take great chances. Its a way of living and being that accepts the risks associated with doing dangerous thrilling things.

For the record according to the LA Times the father fired the producers and ended the deal for a reality show based on this trip when he found out the producers had signed on fully expecting her to die. That was in fact the draw of the project to the producers. So it isn't a case of parents exploiting their children.



Edited by kidneythis (06/18/10 09:33 AM)
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As Mark Twain once quipped, history may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

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#334449 - 06/22/10 11:00 PM Re: 16 year old sailing around the world alone? [Re: jls]
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1552
Loc: New Jersey
Originally Posted By: jls
allowing him to ride dirt bikes or snowmobiles at age nine so I understood his point.


I'm not too sure a 9 year old should be riding a dirt bike either.

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