Several years ago I used to check this sight much more often, and it did me a lot of good. Then I went through a period when I just couldn't look at it. It was too hard to keep getting into things, and I was also trying to see how well I could manage with out it. Another factor was that my access had changed, and I still get pretty nervous at the thought of people knowing about this part of my life.
A few times, though, I've felt drawn back. Sometimes it has been because of a specific issue or question. Other times it was just a kind of curiosity, or a general feeling that I would like to connect again.
Sometimes I have a very strong compulsion to log on, but then I don't know why.
I'm thinking of making a schedule, for example checking in on Mondays and Thursdays. That way it might feel more natural again, and I will get more used to being here.
Thought as a start (I know it's Wednesday--work with me here), I would ask all of you if you have any pattern or intentionality about how you come here.
"This is not my shame, this is their shame." Mona Eltahawy