Newest Members
PaulnMA, andrewmartin, Aurigny, Luther, LuckyCharm
12252 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
Beyond Abuse (51), dona (55), JoMiFa (35), norbrill1 (62), RubyRoberts (62)
Who's Online
1 registered (Rustam), 50 Guests and 5 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12252 Members
73 Forums
63112 Topics
441356 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Topic Options
#329349 - 04/22/10 03:13 PM law and order svu
traillius Offline


Registered: 04/21/10
Posts: 260
in an older episode of that show, a man is handcuffed to a bed by three women, who then have non-consensual intercourse with him. Rape is prosecuted against them, as well as the murder of one of them, by another one of them. It was a good show, and also a study in the discrepancy and double standard applied based on gender in crimes of a sexual nature. it made me a little mad when the defense lawyer said that males aren't able to be abused, and that it insults "real" victims who are women. The judge said men and women cannot be selectively equal. I cheered, inside anyway.One of The women was acquitted, but one testified against the other in the murder of the third, and pled guilty to rape in exchange to avoid a murder charge. It certainly was interesting to watch from the perspective of a male survivor. what do you think?
Edit: Granted the victim in the show was an adult, still the principle is the same for boys of any age, as opposed to girls of the same age who are also victims.



Edited by traillius (04/22/10 03:15 PM)

Top
#329381 - 04/22/10 07:36 PM Re: law and order svu [Re: traillius]
kidneythis Offline


Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 1558
That shows been getting really intense lately. What's her names character is getting very nuts and starting to look off balance. There have been a bunch of rape stories around her.
Last night I caught a short section of it where a man who date raped a bunch of women that she caught and put away saying to him to scare him how pretty he'd be inside. and several other things about what they'd do to him.
Anyway apparently he got used for sex quite a bit and came out even more crazy killed his IDK the term for the guy who owned him,and framed her with DNA for it. He believed she set it up for that guy to abuse him based on her threats.
I had to change channels as he described what happened to him and she tried to apologize it was just to conflicting for me. The anguish he was in as opposed to his crimes might seem right to some but I know that pain and it isn't something to be dismissive about. It is the same pain all women, children, and other victims who are violated feel.
Acting or thinking like its a just form of punishment makes it too easy to minimize the pain of victims.
We can't be saying it's wrong then allowing it to happen to someone just because we don't like them or think they deserve it.
No one deserves that and to think so is a kind of perversion and betrayal to all victims.
Again if its wrong, then its wrong. There is no gradation. X is free from this label so X shouldn't experience it. Y on the other hand is that label so Y gets it done regularly until the sentence is over.

_________________________
As Mark Twain once quipped, history may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

Top
#329450 - 04/23/10 09:51 AM Re: law and order svu [Re: kidneythis]
traillius Offline


Registered: 04/21/10
Posts: 260
Well, it appears I was sentenced to thirty years of silence and denial in the midst of anguish. I also received 22 years of additional such punishment, running concurrently, starting 8 years into the original sentence.+




Edited by traillius (04/23/10 09:52 AM)

Top
#329498 - 04/23/10 06:10 PM Re: law and order svu [Re: kidneythis]
ComicBookGuy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 443
Loc: London, England
Originally Posted By: kidneythis
Again if its wrong, then its wrong. There is no gradation. X is free from this label so X shouldn't experience it. Y on the other hand is that label so Y gets it done regularly until the sentence is over.


I see where you're coming from, but since prison is the only place where sexual abuse is more or less guaranteed to happen, doing anything to put yourself there voluntarily (including bumping off your previous perp), I don't agree with putting that on the shoulders of previous victims who got help with an expectation that I have to sympathise to the same degree as say, the other four kids I suspect were also abused at my school.

I've seen the episode referred to in the OP but not that other one, maybe I'll change my mind when I catch it properly on a repeat.



Edited by ComicBookGuy (04/23/10 06:11 PM)
_________________________
- CBG

Top
#329520 - 04/23/10 09:44 PM Re: law and order svu [Re: ComicBookGuy]
kidneythis Offline


Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 1558
I'm not advocating a perps support group here. I'd love to roast my abusers over a slow fire with doctors close to keep them alive as long as possible, lock them in boxes too small to do anything but hunch, ECt them into babbling idiots so they have to be taught to speak and eat and walk and live all over again repeatedly as they did me. The only thing that will give me peace is the action of the government meant to protect me to make this right. I'd be quite happy with life without parole for them and wish them a long and healthy life. Rape is not a guarantee in prison.

But the fact is I won't roast them or do any of the things they did to me. I couldn't they had me at a persons developmental start and took from me that which cannot be given back. They destroyed who and what I was and prevented me from getting the knowledge all children get. Yada yada yada.

Do you really think it is ok to do to a perp what has been done to us? I know the desire to is there for a lot of us but to say that it is OK to abuse someone just because we were doesn't seem right.

_________________________
As Mark Twain once quipped, history may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

Top
#329561 - 04/24/10 07:04 AM Re: law and order svu [Re: kidneythis]
ComicBookGuy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 443
Loc: London, England
Originally Posted By: kidneythis
Do you really think it is ok to do to a perp what has been done to us? I know the desire to is there for a lot of us but to say that it is OK to abuse someone just because we were doesn't seem right.


Believing in karma, if it happens it happens and I save my emotional energy and sympathy for their victims, whether or not the perps are victimised later. As I noted in the Aaron Vargas thread and the last occasion where the topic of payback has come up, his taking of revenge has only trashed his own life with a jail sentence so I don't know where you read that I said revenge was OK.

Yes you're right, rape in prison isn't a guarantee, just a heightened risk.



Edited by ComicBookGuy (04/24/10 07:05 AM)
_________________________
- CBG

Top
#330330 - 04/30/10 01:41 PM Re: law and order svu [Re: ComicBookGuy]
kidneythis Offline


Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 1558
Originally Posted By: ComicBookGuy
Originally Posted By: kidneythis
Again if its wrong, then its wrong. There is no gradation. X is free from this label so X shouldn't experience it. Y on the other hand is that label so Y gets it done regularly until the sentence is over.


I see where you're coming from, but since prison is the only place where sexual abuse is more or less guaranteed to happen, doing anything to put yourself there voluntarily (including bumping off your previous perp), I don't agree with putting that on the shoulders of previous victims who got help with an expectation that I have to sympathise to the same degree as say, the other four kids I suspect were also abused at my school.

I've seen the episode referred to in the OP but not that other one, maybe I'll change my mind when I catch it properly on a repeat.


This post made me think so.

My point is that if the thing is wrong then its wrong and not ok becasue we think the person deserves it.

It has nothing to do with sympathy or forgiveness or anything other than rightness. Your feelings on the matter don't matter in this context.

I guess I had the impression from what you have to say and how I read it that you do think its ok if a perp or anyone, is violated or abused in prison because they are there.

It is the same thing as oking revenge to my mind, passive agressive as it is.

_________________________
As Mark Twain once quipped, history may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

Top
#330617 - 05/02/10 09:10 AM Re: law and order svu [Re: kidneythis]
ComicBookGuy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 443
Loc: London, England
Well after the general events on MS in the last few weeks I'm not taking people's assumptions on my views personally anymore, I've stated my case you've made up your mind about what you think I was saying, that's life, we don't have to agree, and it's a sign of the high quality and intelligence of that TV show that we're disagreeing.

Take revenge on a perp, you end up in prison yourself. It's stupid, self-destructive and you wouldn't get any closure as it would be after the fact of your abuse. The fact that it is wrong, would be 3rd/4th on my list of priorities. If you want to read that as my saying revenge is OK, then I can't change your mind about it and am done trying.



Edited by ComicBookGuy (05/02/10 09:29 AM)
_________________________
- CBG

Top


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.