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#329711 - 04/25/10 07:24 PM hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not
02151964 Offline


Registered: 04/25/10
Posts: 7
Loc: Canada
new here today , does anybody have the same thoughts


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#329713 - 04/25/10 07:32 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: 02151964]
02151964 Offline


Registered: 04/25/10
Posts: 7
Loc: Canada
I just returned from a trip yesterday with my g/f of 7 years and three children,great time had by all she just dropped me off a copy of internet activity showing some thing she found, ,



Edited by 2151964 (05/02/10 01:58 PM)

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#329716 - 04/25/10 08:04 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: 02151964]
TheBobcatAgain Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/13/10
Posts: 492
Loc: AZ, U.S.A.
02151964,

First of all, welcome to MS. If you would like, you could post a brief introduction of yourself in the Introduction section, saying who you are and what lead you here to MaleSurvivor. It would give the guys here an idea of who you are, and give them the chance to welcome you.

Same Sex Attraction (SSA) is a common symptom of being sexually abused. You are not alone in having these feelings. Many straight men here have also come forward with this issue. My suggestion would be to search for "SSA" on this site and see what you can learn from others' stories.

Good luck. And welcome home. You are among brothers. smile

Your new friend,

Bobcat


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#329725 - 04/25/10 09:00 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: 02151964]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
hi brother, this is something we all share: it's called SSA or same sex attraction. you're not alone in this regard. if you are finding intrusive thoughts then there is definitely something to be examined there. we have a lot of guys who are trying to separate the difference between authentic gay orientation and guys who may be predominantly heterosexual, yet whose natural orientation may have been obscured due to having been sexually abused or assaulted.

hey, check out ken singers book, evicting the perpetrator. check it out here. he has a lot of chapters posted here on the website as well.:

here is just one example from his book

maybe this will inspire you to take proper steps toward healing from the effects of sexual abuse.

warm regards,

ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#329739 - 04/25/10 10:33 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: 02151964]
Geeders Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/03/08
Posts: 1901
Loc: Peterborough, Ontario, Canada
Welcome to MS!

You are by no means alone with this experience. Many here have struggled with the same issue. Take some time to look around and get comfortable. You've made a good first step today. Well done!

Welcome again.

Jim

_________________________
My name is Jim
WoR Mysthaven 2008, Level 2 WoR Alta 2009, Kirkridge 2010, 2011, Oprah 200 men

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#329799 - 04/26/10 10:28 AM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: Geeders]
Regs Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/03/08
Posts: 144
Loc: Oklahoma
Welcome,

You are not alone. There are answers here.


Regs

_________________________
WoR Sequoia Alumni, April 2010

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#330008 - 04/27/10 07:41 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: Regs]
calv Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/27/10
Posts: 45
Loc: seattle


For me... it's more addiction than attraction !

_________________________
“When the Japanese mend broken objects, they aggrandize the damage by filling the cracks with gold. They believe that when something’s suffered damage and has a history it becomes more beautiful.” Barbara Bloom

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#330023 - 04/27/10 09:07 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: calv]
02151964 Offline


Registered: 04/25/10
Posts: 7
Loc: Canada
YOU HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD


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#330103 - 04/28/10 12:30 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am not [Re: 02151964]
Shaun The Sheep Offline


Registered: 03/17/10
Posts: 188
Loc: West Coast
Thanks for joining and participating - you are definitely not alone and I've found a lot of great support and feedback here. If you haven't sought out a therapist yet, I recommend finding one as this support group can't take the place of a qualified therapist (nor can a therapist take the place of this support group, I have learned).

MS and a therapist are two great tastes that go together - like a Reese's peanut butter cup - I'm being facetious of course but wanted to illustrate how best to get help.

People have only started to scratch the surface of how damaging CSA is and what it does over the long term. Survivors often are left with "it didn't really do anything to me and so there's nothing to do" and they don't seek help. You've made a great first step - let us know how to help you move forward.

Best,
~S


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#330106 - 04/28/10 02:34 PM Re: hate being attracted to guys when I know I am [Re: Sans Logos]
JustSurviving Offline


Registered: 04/22/10
Posts: 47
Loc: Hell
-------




Edited by JustSurviving (05/21/10 11:44 PM)

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