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#326850 - 03/31/10 04:52 PM .
bardo213 Offline
Guest

Registered: 11/21/07
Posts: 811
.


Edited by bardo213 (06/21/13 09:54 PM)

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#326852 - 03/31/10 05:14 PM Re: drinking [Re: bardo213]
kidneythis Offline


Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 1558
Well it's not the frequency that makes drinking a problem. Its how you react to the ingestion of alcohol. You say you binge on that one day every month. Binging (that's plural not singular) is a sure sign of a problem.
It appears your drinking habits are affecting others negatively and I can tell you that your uncle and family saw that reaction you had on St. Patty's as confirmation of this problem not you defending your honor or dignity. You see alcohol also distorts perception or it focus' one to the point of narcisism. Apparently you don't see how your behavior is affecting others.

Honestly you sound exactly like I was. "I'm not hurting anyone but myself leave me alone" but I was hurting those who loved me if only by abusing myself that way.
I understand the compulsion to do this. I don't know if you see your drinking as a compulsion yet but its easy to test.
Just don't drink for the next two months. If you do it and aren't wound up tighter than an electrical coil then maybe you just need to control the amount you drink when you do drink. But if you find yourself rationalizing that you've made it X time its proof enough, or the pressure building up as you wait for that two months to pass gets to much and you drink then you likely have a problem. Using other mind altering substances is also included in the two month break. Nothing to alter your mind for two months and see what you have then.
If you become a very angry agitated person then you are probably in trouble with the drinking.

that's all I got for now. Good Luck brother.

_________________________
As Mark Twain once quipped, history may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

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#326880 - 03/31/10 10:00 PM Re: drinking [Re: kidneythis]
Gus Bierer Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 09/16/05
Posts: 160
lynchmob

I have to agree with kidney, it's not the frequency of your drinking but how you react when you do drink and the amount. I am a recoverying alchoholic so you can guess all ready what my take on the situation is. I can understand wanting to let loose once a month, you probably look forword to it. The thing is should you be looking to alcohol for letting loose?

I know i lost respect for how powerfull alcohol is and i consequently developed a problem with it. The thing is it takes like 3 sec. to slam a shot. That one shot impairs your ability to drive a vehicle for a whole hour! Now your sitting there, the 3 sec. have passed and what do you do?

This is the thing because we can consume so much alcohol in a short period of time it's easy to lose ourselves in how impaired we are getting. If you want to let loose and slam 3 shots in 10 min. remember you need to spend the next 3 hrs drinking water. That's what the law says.

I suggest you find another hobby, and use the bar very cautiously. Develop a respect for alcohol before you find yourself unable to control when you drink. Get into a different habit use bodybuilding to unwind or extreme bike riding. Anything that wears you out and gets your endorphins going. And when you go to the bar try drinking just one beer every 30 min or a shot every 30 min. Use alcohol as a social lubricant. Put the bottle down and engage in conversation. Just forget you have a drink in front of your face. Consciously, count how much your drinking. Sip the beer each time you take a drink.

You have to realize that what your doing now is a real bad habit. No one is saying you have to go to AA, yet! But if you don't change the way you drink your in for a lot of problems. BELIEVE THAT!


Gus

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#326882 - 03/31/10 10:13 PM Re: drinking [Re: Gus Bierer]
Survivinguy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/09
Posts: 310
Loc: Colorado
I remember a post from last year I want to say somewhere between February and July that had this really good link or test or something about alcoholism. If I can find it later tonight I will link it here from the thread on here last year. I remember saying something negative about the post (it's not just a river in Egypt.....) and now looking back I know the source of my negativity was denial.

I'm definitely not in a place to say from your post whether you have a "problem" or not but as you know - there are more than a few members here with a ton of experience - I'm sure you will get some good, insightful replies in this thread and I'm thankful you posted it.

If nothing else, I appreciate your willingness to post this and be honest about your drinking habit/style, what your friends/family think and what you think. Very cool man - honest self-evaluation, a willingness to ask for others to give their impressions - that's a lot about why we are all here for all our issues.

I'm going to look for the link now.

=============

Dang it! I could have sworn it was about drinking/alcoholism...turns out it was about sexual addiction. I'm sure though that there's good tests or questionnaires about whether a person has a drinking problem. I will look for that to make up for this screw up.

===============

Ok - Google Drinking Problem Questionnaire. I don't know the policy to posting outside links here so that's a start.



Edited by Survivinguy (03/31/10 10:26 PM)
Edit Reason: followup for link
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Survivinguy

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I have to survive and I hope to thrive.

Alumni Dahlonega WoR May 2010
Alumni Sequoia WoR March 2012

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#326896 - 03/31/10 11:28 PM Re: drinking [Re: bardo213]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
You sound very much like a good friend of mine when it comes to drinking patterns. He doesn't drink regularly but when he does he binges and all hell breaks loose, resulting in family fights, hospitalizations or waking up in jail, not to mention that he's banned from more bars than I can count on two hands because of his behaviour. However, I wouldn't call him an alcoholic since he doesn't possess the need to drink daily or weekly. Rather, I would call him a problem drinker. Anyways its not up to me to slap labels on people. I don't find that useful since its up to each individual to assess where their at. Instead, leaving your family out of it, ask yourself honestly whether the consequences for your drinking are worth accepting or not, just like you would with any other important choice in your life. JS

_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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