I'm a married man with children, slowly making progress from the horrible past. My wife continues to struggle with my past and my path to recoverey. How have other married guys continued your healing and at the same time, continue to build on your relationship with your wife?

I’m sorry to read that your wife struggles with your abuse history and recovery. I can’t imagine how painful it must be for a spouse to listen to and then try to make sense of their love one’s injury. It’s an ugly despicable thing to have to drag them through. But I know for myself and my wife it’s been a journey we have chosen to travel together. I’ve anguished over some of the dark places I’ve forced her to walk. I’m sure she would have wanted to turn and run. Sometimes I’d have to wait and let her regain her courage to continue. Other times she would be pushing me to move forward through the murk.

Of course we found going through this with a couple’s counselor to be extremely valuable and helpful. You may have already done this but if not and if it is available to you and your wife is agreeable I would strongly suggest this route.

It’s a tricky thing to compare each other’s paths. Especially involving our wives. Know that my heart goes out to the two of you but lars your recovery over this issue is paramount. No matter how painful for you or anyone else it has to be given importance for I’m sure you know it won’t just go away. Earlybird