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#320750 - 01/30/10 06:06 PM Re: If bi's not an option, then what do I do? [Re: Sans Logos]
Aberrant30 Offline


Registered: 01/29/10
Posts: 139
Loc: I live on the Emerald Coast, F...
I agree with Ron,= I would say more but I am kind of upset. Being gay didn't make bieng abused easier.

_________________________
"The beginning of eternity
The end of time and space
The beginning of every end,
And the end of every place."
Hint: It's in front of you right now.
(Formerly known as Aberrant30

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#322662 - 02/19/10 05:49 PM Re: If bi's not an option, then what do I do? [Re: Aberrant30]
westsidej Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/04/09
Posts: 150
Loc: Minnesota
Hi everyone.

I just wanted to thank everyone again for all of your advice, support and sharing.

My wife & I are still working on our marriage but it looks better than it has basically since we first started dating.

I am still not sure where I stand in terms of my bisexuality except in the fact that I am okay with saying that both girls/guys turn me on.

If sometime in the future, my wife wants to try a MFM w/ a bi-male, that would be ideal but short of that, I will just accept that I can't act on any of my homosexual desires since I am in a monogamous heterosexual marriage.

Take care and have a great weekend.

Jay

_________________________
My CSA story TRIGGERS!!!!

The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict. Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

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#322674 - 02/19/10 07:29 PM Re: If bi's not an option, then what do I do? [Re: westsidej]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
yes jay and thank you. when you married and promised fidelity to your wife, you had made your choice to rule out all other options. not just all other options with boobs and a vagina, nor options with a penis. it does not matter what their gender is. they've been ruled out, period. to my way of understanding, that's all that's important. who cares anyway, and why? a covenant, though often proclaimed in a public setting, is a very private and personal thing, and should not be scrutinized or judged by anyone. those who judge are the ones with the 'problem'. they need to learn to mind their own business and stop acting as if their own lives are beyond reproach.

just some more of my personal thoughts on the subject.

ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#322682 - 02/19/10 09:19 PM Re: If bi's not an option, then what do I do? [Re: Sans Logos]
westsidej Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/04/09
Posts: 150
Loc: Minnesota
Ron,

Hi. Thanks for the thoughts. That's very true. I would be in so much trouble whether I broke our vows by having sex w/ another man or woman not to mention deeply ashamed of myself.

I have enough guilt in my life as a csa survivor. I don't need to exacerbate it by screwing around w/ another guy or girl.

The only time it would have been okay was the few times we separated in the past by her request, even though it was because I hadn't addressed my csa and its effect on my life and psyche.

Take care and have a great weekend.

Jay

_________________________
My CSA story TRIGGERS!!!!

The hottest place in Hell is reserved for those who remain neutral in times of great moral conflict. Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

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