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#313254 - 12/06/09 10:00 PM Unwanted SSA
Happy Birthday sportinrucks Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/01/04
Posts: 422
Loc: Louisiana
First I would like to say I do not discriminate in anyway people's sexual preference but this is about me and how I prefer to be I have had thoughts about my identity and had things pop up where I have began to question my identity and these thoughts pop up so I am wondering if anybody has tried SSA therapy and does it work? I have heard it does not.


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#313263 - 12/06/09 10:23 PM Re: Unwanted SSA [Re: sportinrucks]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
hi sportin,

reparative therapy works for some people and for others it does not. this is a topic that is a source of great debate even among mental health professionals.

one thing that strikes me about your post and sticks out for me is the question of preference. it's true that many of us do have a preference, but often people who have had their sexual orientation confused by abuse find that abuse has all but obliterated their ability to know who they would have been without the interference of abuse. others instinctively know who they are sexually and are able to recover and embrace that state with time and therapy, whether it be homo, hetero or somewhere in between. but in the same way that external events did not cause tallness, shortness, or eye color, we do know that SA cannot change one's inborn orientation. that is a combination of so many inborn factors.

i hope you are able to find what works best to help you discover the sexuality you were meant to have by design, and to come to be at peace with that.

all the best,

ron

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#313283 - 12/07/09 12:17 AM Re: Unwanted SSA [Re: Sans Logos]
DJsport Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
Sport,

I tried reparative therapy. It took part of me away for sometime. For me it increased my level of disassociation.

But, your not alone in questioning and desiring your own sexuality.

I did not ask others about sexuality as I was too frightened before going into reparaative therapy.

Peace,
DJ

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Live to your fullest potential

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#313321 - 12/07/09 08:15 AM Re: Unwanted SSA [Re: Sans Logos]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
Quote:
we do know that SA cannot change one's inborn orientation.


there is no proof that sexual orientation is inborn, or an inborn genetic "trait" like eye color or hight etc.

paraphrased from the APA: "...no evidence has emerged that would lead scientists to conclude that sexual orientation is caused by any factor or set of factors, many believe that both nature AND nurture play complex roles"

while many also believe they were born with an intact sexual orientation this is not supported by the evidence,....an objective overview of the evidence seems to suggest that one develops their sexual orientation over time, perhaps quite early for some, perhaps later for others, and is a result of a combination of biological, environmental, and sociological factors acting in concert...no single factor can be completely eliminated as having played at least some role, but no single factor is a known specific cause, including biological factors like genetics and external factors like SA...and that everyones sexualilty has its own unique set of highly complex variables.

although genetics clearly plays a role in everything we do and are, including our sexuality and attractions, the question is do they actually "determine" these things beyond our general physical and emotional response traits? not very likely, as an example, one might have certain genetics that may make you a superior basketball player (like hight and athletic ability etc.), however these traits do not determine that you will be a basketball player, one must come in contact with many environmental and social factors in order for you to actually be a basketball player. without these specific factors, you could end up as a very tall athletic cashier at walmart....but if we were to only look at genetics we might erroneously conclude that you were born a basketball player, since many individuals who are basketball players have similar genetics...but of course that is absurd.

sexual attractions are certainly infinitely more complex than my example but similar in that familial relationships personal experiences and broader social influences are at the end of the developmental chain. a recent large scale identical twin study out of Europe saw that "non shared" environmental factors (unique personal experiences not shared by the other identical twin) play a larger role in how sexual orientation develops, over the smaller role of genetics, that genetics alone cannot explain the development of sexual orientations....also there was a study done on rhesus monkeys that saw when baby rhesus monkeys are removed from the influence of their parents and other monkeys at a very young age, they have underdeveloped sexualities and are unable to breed and function sexually, which suggests that external factors are important in the development of normative sexuality in primates.

i hope that clarifies things to a degree for some.



Edited by myboyhoodfears (12/07/09 10:28 AM)
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#313331 - 12/07/09 09:13 AM Re: Unwanted SSA [Re: myboyhoodfears]
ModTeam Offline
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MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/06
Posts: 689
Before this thread starts to go awry, a reminder is in order to keep this thread on track by making responses to the original posts, and avoid turning other responses into points of debate. That type of posting style is better suited for the Open Forum. Please do try to keep this discussion pertinent to the topic posted which in this case is the question: does reparative therapy work?. If this question triggers ideas for other posts, please feel free to start one in the appropriate forum.

Appreciatively,

The Moderator Team

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#313336 - 12/07/09 09:50 AM Re: Unwanted SSA [Re: myboyhoodfears]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
about reparative therapy, the APA says that it does not work, however they describe change as going from exclusively attracted to the same sex to exclusively attracted to the opposite sex,...responsable reparative therapists however do not make that claim, they say that while some individuals may change their attractions to exclusively attracted to the opposite sex, this is not the norm and that most go from mostly or somewhat attracted to the same sex, to mostly not,...and they also state that change may not be possible in every case or even in most cases,....

also there are unscrupulous therapy methods that will likely do more damage than good,...as with any therapy, buyer beware, do your homework and read as much as you can and find a therapist that works for you, whether you seek to change your sexual attractions or affirm them.

cookie cutter therapy is probably not such a good idea in my personal view, for reasons that are apparent in my previous post, we are all unique in our sexual development, and therapy that addresses this uniqueness is likely to have a positive result, than those that attempt to force everyone into the same box. for instance some will say that father hunger is why you have these attractions and if you deal with that relationship this will help change your attractions,...while this approach may work for some, what about those who don't have father hunger?...same with SA, or any other factor,...conversly a therapist that sees each individuals development as unique will be able to tailor their therapy methods to that person, and you might have better luck.



Edited by myboyhoodfears (12/07/09 09:56 AM)
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