I know that this topic has been covered, but I felt the need to explore it once again, and to hear the varying responses from others here.
I've come to believe that MOST of us who chose not to disclose to our parents did so because of lack of proper parenting (teaching children to be assertive and directly instructing them to tell their Mom or Dad if someone tries doing anything they don't feel comfortable with, etc.)
In my story
, the one time as a child that I tried to disclose turned out to be a tragic mistake. (disclosed to my 11yo brother and his friend who made fun and laughed at me instead of offering any kind of sympathy or support.) This kept me from ever disclosing again for almost 30 years. In that time, my life went no where, directionless, meaningless, just numbing out with drugs and alcohol was all I looked forward to.
ANYWAY, my point is that if I was TOLD what to do, this all could have been avoided, which is tragic to me, so much lost potential. Sigh.
Back to the subject in general. What *I* would like to know is, WHY is it that something that is now taught in kindergarten classes (CSA awareness) was blatantly missing in my generation. Seriously, CSA has ALWAYS been around, right? So, why is it that only 30 years ago, it was not considered outrageous for a hardly-known neighbor to invite someone's son over for a "camping trip" or even to take him out for dinner?
1978 = "What a nice man, of course you're welcome to take my 9yo son camping with you"
2009 = "What? You've gotta be kidding me! You must be a perp, stay away from my kids!"
Why is it that when something like this is tried nowadays, eyebrows are immediately raised and parent's defense shields are set on maximum and an immediate answer is a "NO"?
What were my parents and their generation missing in this department? Did they live in some kind of Leave-it-to-Beaver fantasy land where kids, in particular boys, never get sexually violated? What is their excuse? That they didn't hear enough public announcements about CSA?
Just wondering why some many of us fell through the cracks, so to speak.