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#31054 - 05/19/02 08:58 PM Writing as confrontation
manchild Offline

Registered: 11/22/00
Posts: 35
Loc: netherlands

I have an urge to share.

Long time i have been busy with therapy and finding a feeling of safety.
I have been to University again and last year i have realized my longing to move back to the big city where i grew up. Decorating is quite some work but progressing and i am enjoying new, warm and supporting contacts.

In the perspective of completing my creation of my home, I concluded, that before i go working again, i want to write letters to my father/perp and his family.
Within a short time someone offered me to join to go to their retreat place on a mountain to find out if i could write the letters there.

It was a great place for a wholesome retreat.
Warmth from sawing and chopping wood, light from candles at night, water from a well, three hours walking for shopping food.

Even though the first week i had the company of three different groups of people, i started writing in the first weekend and kept writing about an hour a day.
I even noticed, that when the last party was gone i missed the diversion of company.

Sawing and chopping wood was great as an outlet of agression/energy and a way to get clear in the head before or after writing.

I am busy with furnishing again and considering to find a temporary job for diversion from finishing the writing of the letters. I will decide if i want to post the letters later, for now i just write for me.

I feel more safe, more room to grow and flowing. I am life.

Greets to you all, brothers.

#31055 - 05/20/02 11:01 AM Re: Writing as confrontation
tofeno Offline

Registered: 10/12/01
Posts: 18
Loc: Toronto, Canada

I idnitified with your post from many ways.I to am in university and am a month away from finishing. But to find the energy to keep on working is becoming more dificult by the day. I have dreamed of having a retreat place to go to and be away from the movement of city life. You are lucky to have found such a place. My dreams are calling me to become a different person and the shift from who the abuse created to who I am as a person. This is a dificult path and one that has taken alot of energy this year. I wish you luck and love with your journey.


The search for love continues even in the face of great odds.

bell hooks


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