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#30974 - 03/05/04 07:21 AM Childish behavior
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
I am now just beginning to realize how much I go back to childhood like things and behaviors with the panic. I just realized it when I woke up this morning on the floor. It always was such normal thing, when I am sick or scared to sleep on the floor. It felt safer or something, and also, was not allowed to sleep in bed when I was sick when I was young. (In case I throw up in the bed, of course). I am realizing that I have always done this, as an adult, away from home, that I still go back to being child at those times. Now that I am actually recognizing that, I am wondering how hard it will be to change it. I still have not been to sleep, as it is almost 6:30 here. But I am still somewhat sick, and I am going to make a hard try to go to bed IN bed, and not be such a child tonight.

Leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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#30975 - 03/05/04 09:30 AM Re: Childish behavior
coolcat Offline
Member

Registered: 02/23/04
Posts: 109
Loc: Winnipeg MB Canada
I hear you. I am just starting to deal with my abuse and alot of the things you said brings back alot of thoughts.

It is 7 am where i am, I've had about 2.5 hours sleep last night. I seem to sleep better durning the day,seems safer or something. I am just getting so tired though. Take care of yourself.
Gus

_________________________
Take it easy, Don't that the sounds of your own wheels drive you crazy....
Gus

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#30976 - 03/05/04 11:41 AM Re: Childish behavior
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
Leosha what a huge step. You now can confront the reality. Not some vague thing but the real stuff. Can you change it? You bet you can. Just a step at a time.

Take your stuffed animal to bed and remember that he does not like to sleep on the floor just as you dont.

Keep it up my brother.

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

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#30977 - 03/05/04 12:19 PM Re: Childish behavior
Ivanhoe Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/19/03
Posts: 1907
Leosha,

Confronting our fears, that's what my therapist says is our main job in healing. Our fears are just that, he says, feelings...and they can change once we deal with them. But now, we are not alone like when we first had those fears.

How about Roland, Gus and Mike, don't you just wish that we had brothers like that when we were growing up?

Now, we have each other. Hopefully, we have our therapist, and, maybe, most important, we have our friends, whether they are family or not.

I know that you feel the love and encouragement, here. Most of us know how much love and encouragement that you bring to this site.

Take what you find here, use what your therapist suggests and know, like Mike says, little by little, step by step, it will get better. You're working on it, not running away from it, and, you bring us courage, too, in the midst of your pain.

I continue to send you my best for a better tomorrow.

David

_________________________
"No soul is desolate as long as there is a human being for whom it can feel trust and reverence."
George Eliot

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#30978 - 03/05/04 03:38 PM Re: Childish behavior
crisispoint Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 2154
Loc: Massachusetts
Leo,

I find that, sometimes, the childish behavior we do now is trying to reconnect with our childhood, in the sense of what's stolen from us.

Yes, by all means, take back what's yours. Recapture what you know to be right. But remember that all childhood behaviors aren't bad, just a way to get back what we're cheated of.

Do you know that, today, right now, I am angry at how much of MY childhood was stolen and that I try to keep and reconnect with 11-12 year old me every day? Comics books, cartoons, sleeping in a fetal position, the whole bit.

And, Leo, you ARE an adult. You ARE a strong man, no matter where or how you sleep.

Hug the inner child, boyo!

Peace and love,

Scot

_________________________
There are reasons I'm taking medication. They're called "other people." - Me, displaying my anti-social tendancies

fromacuriousmind.blogspot.com
malehurtandsurvive.blogspot.com

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