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#306754 - 10/16/09 08:49 PM Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story.
petercorbett Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2435
Loc: TEXAS
Hi, my fraternal brothers.

Well I got back the other day from visiting a retired senior NCO friend of mine. He and i go back a long way. He was the best man at my wedding 36 years ago.

Ok, Pete, just what does this have to do with Dont Ask & Don't Tell?

While I was there, there was a demonstration by gay & lesbian's. It was there that president Obama, had made the pledge to review & maybe over turn the military's policy about gays serving in the military.

Well he told me in no certain terms, that it will not happen. Those "queers" & "faggots" will and should
never be alowed to serve their country.

Well, he was the first friend that i had told my SECRET to, just over a year ago. And from him i got compassion, understanding and love. (For being sexually abused as a young boy).

He has taken an interest in my recovery progress & failures.

He prays for me.

Now, I have had finally figured out that i probably was gay orientated for most of my life, buried just under the concious surface, until August a year ago. And I was going to tell him about me. But due to his strong felings about gay' & lesbians in the military, i decided not to.

But, we both agreed that more than likely, we have both served with them, we both ate with them, we both have slept in the same quarters with them. Served in a combat zone with them. And he never could tell "one" of "them" if he was standing right next to one. After all i was there. He has the notion that "one of them" would try and seduce him, and nothing could be further from the truth than that statement.

I'ts that catch all phrase in military justice.
Preduicial(sp) to good order and discipline. Unit cohesion.

So, i guess that i could say, that i have his LIMITED compassion & understanding.

I guess that he didn't see that picture of little Peter with that rainbow ribbon from that WOR in Alta.

It hurt me deeply, listning to his remarks about me and my gay brothers, but more hurtful is that "WE" are not considered worthy human beings.

After all he and i served together in Germany, Vietnam & Okinawa. Neither i, nor anybody else was ever a "threat" to him or others.

Maybe i have lost a "friend" just because of my sexual orientation.

Maybe, little Pete & big Pete, really didn't need that kind of a friend.

It is my personal opinion that the Don't Ask & Don't Tell policy be overturned..OFFICIALLY.

We, have been serving our country with distinction, ever since the Continental Army days.

Sorry for rambling.

Heal well my gay brothers, it's about compassion & understanding.

" I will take that lost boys hand, and i will lead him from the depths of darkness, into the sunshine, forever into eternity".

Little Pete & big Pete..but 1 (Irishmoose).



Edited by petercorbett (10/16/09 08:52 PM)
_________________________
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
____________________________________________________________
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.


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#306772 - 10/17/09 02:22 AM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: petercorbett]
sono Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/19/09
Posts: 1069
Hey Peter,

I'm so very sorry you had that experience and at this point in your life and career of service. So many of us have had the experience of sharing something or wanting to share something with someone, only to have it go wrong, not be received in an understanding way that it does cross all orientation lines. It's not just an orientation that can unexpectedly turn someone away as we all certainly know here.

I hope you do tell this person your truth at some point and rid yourself of someone who for whatever the reason doesn't seem ready to be part of your future...which is a shame for him, not you. He's certainly losing far more than you.

lots of support,

sono

_________________________
the family
the perp

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#306847 - 10/17/09 05:27 PM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: sono]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
I think its so unfortunate that the military has this policy. I served myself (in the Canadian forces) and looking back I can't comprehend why someone's sexuality should even be an issue. With everyone dressed in the same in drab green and being too dead tired to even think about anything other than eating and sleeping why sex or orientation should even be in the picture. I would also add that my personal experience as a survivor made me a good soldier. Being able to withstand the adversity of abuse prepared me for the rigours of the military, if this makes any sense. JS

_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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#306860 - 10/17/09 07:27 PM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: petercorbett]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
pete, i love you brother. i feel so greatly cherished in your presence. there are few places to go where that is true. you are a good loving man and i so deeply appreciate [and desperately need] you and your special heart.

thanks for showing a jesus heart for me and all the gay brothers.

((((( pete ~ big and small )))))

all the best,

ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#306862 - 10/17/09 07:51 PM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: jls]
1islandboy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 859
Loc: washington
Part of my overseas orientation class had an instructor that raised this issue. I was informed that the brass knew there was a lot of same-sex sex going on and we were advised to use a rubber.

I also took a college class while in the military called "The History of Western Civilization." I am in no way agreeing with anything about greek society. But to make any arguement that your sexual orientation has anything to do with your capabilities as a soldier serving your country is s2pid.

Turning Japanese (The Kinks ~or~ The Vapors)

island

_________________________
Rise above the storm and you will find the sunshine ~ M.F. Fernandez

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#306865 - 10/17/09 08:09 PM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: 1islandboy]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
I couldn't agree more. If sex is on the mind of anyone involved in a firefight then they should be discharged anyways, gay or straight.

_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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#306879 - 10/18/09 12:46 AM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: jls]
Matt0487 Offline


Registered: 05/29/09
Posts: 27
Loc: Houston, TX, USA
Pete, I hope that when you speak with your friend he will change his thoughts on the issue. I know many people who I have known, personally used to say many homophobic things. After they saw that I was a great person and not someone that they could stereotype, their words started to change.

Don't ask Don't Tell is a stupid way that the Republican party manipulates the Christian vote. I wish that Republicans would cater to us gays more and that Democrats could learn how to cater to Christians without compromising on our rights. I still think that talking to your friend may change his thoughts, but it may not. If it doesn't, you are amazing, powerful and strong. You are a dear friend and I am proud to know you!

Matt- WOR Kempenfelt Alumni 2009
Advanced WOR Alta Aluni 2009


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#306902 - 10/18/09 08:23 AM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: petercorbett]
Geeders Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/03/08
Posts: 1901
Loc: Peterborough, Ontario, Canada
Ohhh, shit Pete... cry

(((Pete)))

It never ceases to amaze me how strong you are!

Jim

_________________________
My name is Jim
WoR Mysthaven 2008, Level 2 WoR Alta 2009, Kirkridge 2010, 2011, Oprah 200 men

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#306908 - 10/18/09 11:46 AM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: Geeders]
michael Joseph Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
love is the answer

hate is part of life

but love wins over hate

unfortunately sometimes people hurt or kill due to hate

MJ

_________________________
Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
The Round Table, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat

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#306936 - 10/18/09 03:18 PM Re: Don't Ask & Don't tell. One persons story. [Re: michael Joseph]
Matt0487 Offline


Registered: 05/29/09
Posts: 27
Loc: Houston, TX, USA
Michael, I love your response!! Awesome. I want to put it as a facebook quote. Its soo true!

Matt- WOR Kempenfelt Alumni 2009
Advanced WOR Alta Alumni 2009


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