Jim, DrBob, everyone,

That is one of the best resources for young men I've ever seen. The second link has similar resources for various other groups, i.e. female or adult victims, etc. Thanks for sharing it, Jim. Good job!

You are all welcome!

JIM-
i've got to add a HUGE thankyou for those links- I've not printed and read every word yet of them but previewed them online and I am thrilled to have them as resources.

thank you thankyou thank You! An

Just be sure to look for that teeny weeny "pdf" link and you can print your own!

No, much to our surprise, he did not ask his sister. We also think his bio father [perp] may have twisted things and told my son that his mother [my wife] falsely accused him of abusing my son's sister. His sister does not speak to her bio father and avoids him at all cost. She has not seen him in over three years.

I'm sure he wonders why his sister doesn't want anything to do with his father. From the bits and pieces he says, it sounds like his bio father complains to him about his sister having nothing to do with him. My wife said her ex was very manipulative. During their divorce the court ordered psychological evaluations on all of them and he had some sexual identity and addiction issues. Very complex story.

Anyway, it might be just as well for now b/c my wife mentioned to our daughter that her brother may ask her what happened. She has great coping skills however I did sense some apprehension in her over the weekend so it may have been best for the moment.

We'll get through it and the kids will get the proper help they deserve.

Thank you for posting this info. I wish I would have had access to this when I was younger. Please hold on to this useful info and present it to people who will need it in the future.

re his sister's seeming reticence- understanding for sure re roles/ sexuality issues- any chance for third party T facilitation that she would choose/ be comfortable with OR if she was more comfortable writing or taping what she did want to share- as a way of taking her off the "hot spot" of thinking she'll be asked details she's not comfortable sharing. cause i don't think he's(son) looking for details as much as affirmation of own experiences /perceptions.

just an idea to throw out there. she also may just need time and understanding it's non accusatory- she may still have some self blame stuff going on- particularly given the parental manipulative, etc background. i'm thinking she's over 18- was an sia group anything she'd consider visiting or even their website/boards (surv. of incest anon) they have good literature too and i was surprised (very) to find there were 2 local groups in my area- one coed , one female.

All Hope and Healing to you, Can't remember if you said you've gotten book -Mike Lew's victims no longer - i know son's not disclosed but even on behalf of your daughter its worth reading. i'm female and found it healing for my own csa experiences as well as profound for understanding my male friend w/ csa trauma. it's an amazing book...

An