Newest Members
dspwilson, Won'tGiveUp, sillyputty, Pytbull, manipulated
12384 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
Alan Fountain (52), blindpet (31), egoror (49), Midas (33), uwa (78)
Who's Online
5 registered (Obi, genedebs, 3 invisible), 34 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12384 Members
74 Forums
63649 Topics
444527 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 2 of 2 < 1 2
Topic Options
#30432 - 11/06/03 09:16 AM Re: Trust
Pollyanna Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/10/03
Posts: 211
Loc: Missouri
I sit here scratching my head wondering why my "little buddy" seems to blindly trust anyone who is remotely kind to him.

I realize there hasn't been an overabundance of kindness from those he should have been able to trust in his life. Maybe he still doesn't consciously "get it"??

He's also on the first leg of his "journey." We'll see what happens as he moves along.

Lynn

_________________________
"Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don't give up."

Anne Lamott

Top
#30433 - 11/06/03 08:02 PM Re: Trust
Green Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/13/03
Posts: 115
Loc: NYC, NY
Pollyanna,

I understand what you are writing. Another way of looking at it is that I have a very hard time distinguishing foe and friend. So, besides being untrusting, I sometimes trust inapropriately.

Harry


Top
#30434 - 11/06/03 10:39 PM Re: Trust
fishpond Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 10/29/03
Posts: 6
Loc: California
I think that the difficulty I have in trusting others is strongly related to the trust I placed in my abuser. He was an individual in a postion of authority (a vocation director in the Catholic Church) and when I trusted him I was literally screwed. After that, not trusting anyone who wanted to be close to me became a really adaptive thing! Somewhere inside of myself I figured that if you trust someone, something very bad is going to happen to you. And now, even with the knowledge that I am a different person and that I can take care of myself, I still get very defensive and scared when I'm in a position where I need to trust someone. This makes for a lonely life, but I think maybe I am making a little progress.
Thanks to all of you who contribute to this site. You seem to be a great bunch of guys.

_________________________
Dave

Top
#30435 - 11/21/03 02:48 PM Re: Trust
AdamKGVa Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/23/03
Posts: 7
Loc: King George, Va
Quote:
Originally posted by Pollyanna:
I sit here scratching my head wondering why my "little buddy" seems to blindly trust anyone who is remotely kind to him.

I realize there hasn't been an overabundance of kindness from those he should have been able to trust in his life. Maybe he still doesn't consciously "get it"??

He's also on the first leg of his "journey." We'll see what happens as he moves along.

Lynn
Thank you for posting this. I myself am still to this day trusting to a fault. I've often wondered why I never developed a wall and mainly figured that was just another sign that I wasn't a victim by a willing participant.


Top
#30436 - 11/21/03 03:06 PM Re: Trust
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
I am just now realizing, that the loss of trust, the break of trust, it can be a great experience to learn from. Of course, it is not something nice or fun, ever. But, someone once said something of how we learn more from our mistakes then we do to do things right. So, perhaps we learn more from the breakdown of trust then trust itself? (Sorry, I think maybe I am going in circles with sense and losing here! I am posting again in this thread maybe to make it make more sense in my mind).

Perhaps I should end this post before it actually makes sense! apologies!

leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

Top
Page 2 of 2 < 1 2


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.