Newest Members
susanhepp, Breathe, georgetwo, frozen45, lilac
12291 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
Guillermo (37), illbedat (26), Mike58 (56), Mnovit (38), Mongo (24), pwdasw (64), Raymond Sean (38), yesac76 (38)
Who's Online
4 registered (Obi, woodenshoes, JayBro, 1 invisible), 26 Guests and 6 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12291 Members
73 Forums
63237 Topics
442211 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Topic Options
#303892 - 09/23/09 07:34 PM On my own
TW16 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 06/11/09
Posts: 157
Loc: Utah
I just moved out on my own this past weekend for the first time and I am more nerveous than excited about it.

My family thinks it is a bad idea because of some problems that I have, including a disabilitgy I have, and that I am somewhat immature for my age.

I moved into a cono with three other guys in my church, and they--as well as some other friemds--are helping me out with things that I need.

When I was living at home I was living in a very abusive envirnment (mostlyverbal abuse). I have tried to move out before, but things didn't work out and I remained at home.

I don't have much money and really can't afford to move out, but because of the abuse I was dealing with, my church leader and friends strongly advised me to move immediately and the Church will help with the expenses. My church leader said that the Church will cover my deposit and rent for October as well as my therapy (which I was paying for). I was also told that I won't have to worry about food as it will be taken care of.. all these for at least a little while anyway.

The other night I got talking with one of my roommates and somehow the topic of me being abused came up. I don't remember why I told him, but I did. However, I don't really regret it or feel bad about it because I guess it's because it isn't my fault that I was abused--some of the time anyway. My roommate seemed very concerned and wanting to help. How should I deal with this? The only people who know about my abuse are my closest friends and those who need to know, like a therapist or religious leader.

tw16


Top
#303933 - 09/24/09 01:23 AM Re: On my own [Re: TW16]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
tw16,

I would be cautious in what I share with others until I know them well and know that they are trustworthy. Wish you the best in your new living arrangements.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

Top
#303952 - 09/24/09 08:10 AM Re: On my own [Re: TW16]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
yes, i agree with michael. i have been really hurt by religious types who can't seem to get past their own 'morality' biases. sorry to stereotype these people, but the ones i encountered did not have the wherewithall to not lump victims into the same mental category as perps. i would ask myself this question: what do i need more at this time, the safety and assurance of a roof, food, and therapy, or to satisfy the inquisitive nature of a 'friend'? whose needs must be put first? yours or theirs?

sorry if that sounds paranoid, but you asked.

good luck with that,

ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


Top


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.