Newest Members
GKB, MorganWut, myrlin, AaronS, BookHouseBoy
12465 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
cyrus (44), Dupe1978 (36), James_Is_Talking (36), K-man (58), LordShiningStarr (36), ricky (51), Shawn Hope (29), teresa (42), Warner82 (32)
Who's Online
3 registered (tbkkfile, Banjo596, CheerfulJohn), 23 Guests and 5 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12465 Members
74 Forums
63998 Topics
446694 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 3 of 3 < 1 2 3
Topic Options
#300201 - 08/22/09 01:02 PM Re: curious to know... [Re: nomansanisland]
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11136
Loc: Denver, CO
Being of a spiritual bend, I tend to let God handle the aspect of justice. You know that verse that says "what a man sows, that will he also reap"? In my case, one perp is dead by Parkinsons, another is old and dealing with her fourth round of cancer, and the third one I scared the crud out of when I popped up into his life after 32 years. Based on these instances, they have been dealt with in ways that I could not have thought of or controlled. Don't get me wrong, I don't wish death or suffering on anyone. I just know that things work themselves out through God's universal laws in motion.

Honestly, we may never see those who hurt us come to any true sense of "justice," but this does not prevent us from processing our hurts and sharing them with caring souls willing to listen and support. In my case, emotional debts from others have been processed and therefore able to be canceled. If I don't cancel them, I am burdened the rest of my life with "unfinished business." I just hate having red ink on the emotional books.

Andy

_________________________
List of things ain't nobody got time for:

1. That


If I could meet myself as a boy...

Top
#300204 - 08/22/09 01:46 PM Re: curious to know... [Re: FormerTexan]
nomansanisland Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/09
Posts: 156
Loc: NM
andy...
I love it!!
I love it!!!

so right, so on the money...I love the emotional debts as being cancelled and paid. thanks so much for your imput. nomansanisland

_________________________
" If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drum. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away." Henry David Thoreau

Top
#300210 - 08/22/09 02:57 PM Re: curious to know... [Re: nomansanisland]
TJ jeff Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/07/04
Posts: 3379
Loc: Northern Wisconsin
Justice - it's something that is extremely hard to understand for those of us who have not been able to put our perps in prison (in my case - it was an uncle - no one in the family knows about it)

I know it can often seem that we are the only ones who know the real truth - but... we are'nt - God knows - and... all of us here in this site know

for me personaly - my faith in justice in regards to my past comes from a>
_________________________
Who will cry for the little boy? - I will... - Antwone Fisher

Abuse happens in silence/isolation - Recovery happens only when that silence/isolation is broken...

TJ's History

Top
#300214 - 08/22/09 03:16 PM Re: curious to know... [Re: TJ jeff]
petercorbett Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2450
Loc: TEXAS
Hi my fraternal brothers,

I'm closer to TJ's way of thinking.

All my sexual abusers are dead.

But even in my confusion on religion (right now), I'll have to go on what God had promised, just like what TJ refers to.

" I will take that lost boys hand, and i will lead him from the depths of darkness, into the sunshine, forever into eternity".

Heal well my fraternal brothers, heal well.

Little Pete & big Pete. but 1 (Irishmoose),

_________________________
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
____________________________________________________________
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.


Top
#303738 - 09/22/09 06:32 PM Re: curious to know... [Re: sono]
rebecca24 Offline


Registered: 07/15/09
Posts: 34
Loc: AZ
Hatred is fuel but it can also keep you from moving forward. try to move out of the situation with an affirmation. The cannot stay too long as itwill make you bitter and hurt the people around you. A man whoturns victim into soilder and helps to make hate into peace can do much more for a world of healing

Say something that you wish to practice in a w eeek a month etc. keepajournal and write down why the hate is there what is motivation to move out of it or stay there and set goals daily to move past this


Top
#303779 - 09/22/09 11:54 PM Re: curious to know... [Re: rebecca24]
nomansanisland Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/09
Posts: 156
Loc: NM
rebecca24
thanks for the suggestions. I am at this time letting heavenly father take care of cariing the burden till i have the strength to carry it all by my self.I have tried positive affirmations and i do believe they help out. I start my day with a good thought and try to accomplish what i am supposed to be each day doing for myself, make goals and try to live a life that i am proud of.i have allowed this process to help with the forgiveness aspect. I am here beacvuse i want changes and healing. realizing that hatred is neagtive to my spritiual growth, I can say that i am a work in progress...thanks for your imput.

_________________________
" If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drum. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away." Henry David Thoreau

Top
#303810 - 09/23/09 08:08 AM Re: curious to know... [Re: nomansanisland]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6571
Loc: Never Sugar Mountain
I was fortunate enough to be able to cut the chains and walk away. The chain cutter, as you may recall, was my forgiviness of "them." NOTHING felt better than that forgiveness.

I struggled with witht the forgiviness the bible said I should afford them...struggled for decades. It was not until Rob Bell said "you do TRULY forgive someone until you also wish them well."

I hope I'm not off-base with this entry.

_________________________
You are using 118 of the 300 allowed characters.

Still Not Recognized


Top
#303816 - 09/23/09 09:28 AM Re: curious to know... [Re: Still]
LilacLouie Offline


Registered: 07/02/09
Posts: 359
Loc: Utah
You're spot on, Robbie. Forgiving is better than hating. You can still dislike, but you give up on hating because there simply isn't anything there to hate.


Top
#303831 - 09/23/09 12:07 PM Re: curious to know... [Re: LilacLouie]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Great post. For me, I had to forgive myself for what happened. To realize it was his behaviors that were out of line. I don't know that I have really forgiven him for what he did to me as a child.
But I had to let go of my anger and desire for vengeance towards him. Because it kept me chain to him and what he did to me. And was slowly poisoning me.
I had to allow God to be the one to past judgement on his behaviors and what he did too me.
Learned late last year that he died from ALS/mnd a year ago June. And suffered with it the last couple years of his life.
In the end he learn what it was like to be helpless and at the mercy of something outside of his control. So in a way he got a taste of his own medicine. And has given me some sense of justice.

AlS/MND/MS are called the wasting dieases because you slowly loss voluntary muscle contol of your body.
Maybe there is justice in the unverse. Because this disease is worst then anything I imagined doing to him.
Alot slower too.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

Top
Page 3 of 3 < 1 2 3


Moderator:  ModTeam 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.