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#302208 - 09/08/09 06:21 PM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: J.R.]
ComicBookGuy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 443
Loc: London, England
If ComicBookGuy makes a comment on that story, it isn't me, it was already taken - had to go with SurvivorCBG to register, but made my comment in support. Let's all try to get some good views in, depending on how long they host it for.



Edited by ComicBookGuy (09/08/09 06:23 PM)
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#302224 - 09/08/09 09:09 PM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: ComicBookGuy]
zb420 Offline


Registered: 08/16/09
Posts: 251
...



Edited by zb420 (11/27/09 06:30 PM)
Edit Reason: sorry

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#302231 - 09/08/09 09:22 PM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: zb420]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
JustScott, your comment caught my attention.

You mentioned the fact that he (not of his own choosing, but because everyone KNOWS anyway) isn't going to keep this some dark secret for 15, 20, 30 years, only to manifest itself later in a dysfunctional life of broken relationships, drug abuse, and countless other failed coping strategies that we at MS have become so adept at later in our lives. He's getting help NOW. In this one way, a forced disclosure, so to speak, the damage is at least minimized, instead of being compounded with bad/harmful choices that survivors tend to make in their life after the abuse.

Another thing about Shawn; his demeanor, his attitude. He.....doesn't carry himself as someone bitter and angry. Amazing how the human spirit can transcend the worst transgressions, isn't it?


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#302332 - 09/09/09 02:35 PM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: Hauser]
jacobtk Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/08/03
Posts: 527
Well, I would imagine that is just an extension of the "face" he had to wear during his abuse. He was apparently successful enough at convincing the people around him that when they saw the missing person's notice of him on TV he convinced them that it wasn't him. So it might just seem like he is well adjusted while he may be very bitter and angry inside. I'm not saying he is, just that we can't really tell.

_________________________
Every day I die again, and again Iím reborn/Every day I have to find the courage/To walk out into the street/With arms out/Got a love you canít defeat/Neither down nor out/Thereís nothing you have that I need/I can breathe/Breathe now - U2

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#302337 - 09/09/09 03:08 PM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: jacobtk]
boylikeme Offline


Registered: 08/10/09
Posts: 546
Loc: hell

I agree with jacok.. just cuz he can smile in front of a camera doesnt mean hes not bitter n angry inside.. i wouldnt share tthose feelings with a couple million strangers either

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#302356 - 09/09/09 08:30 PM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: boylikeme]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca


This was a powerful film and I really am grateful that Shawn had the courage to to speak about happen to him at the hands Mr Devlin. He is a remarkable young man as are the guys here at M/S. His statement of how Mr Devlin told him that he had just been at the wrong place at the wrong time. Resolves him of any blame or responsibility for what happened to him. Which is also true for the rest of us survivors. It was Devlins behaviors that are shameful and not how Shawn was able to cope with what was happening to him.
I went home to my grandmother after everyday of my abuse and was incapable of speaking out for help until 20 yrs later. Your abuser and abuse are to difficult to deal with as a child . And perps are masters at isolating their victims emotionally if not physically.
Shawn is lucky to have such caring and supportive parents. They will be a real positive force as he grows up and deal with the trauma of his abuse. None of us comes away unscatched but with support we can learn to deal and overcome the negative coping behaviors that we learn from our abuse. I was hurt by some people whom should have protected me but I am not damage goods.
And I can live a healthy and happy life in spite of what happened in the past if i so choose too.

Shawn told the world that he is a survivor and we are too. I am proud to call him my brother in recovery.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#302362 - 09/09/09 09:36 PM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: michael banks]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6709
Loc: USA
There are some really good statements made above about Shawn. And they are supportive. I am glad of this.

I can't help adding another statement.

I was also held captive by my abuser at age 12. I was taken out of bed while asleep and of course without my consent. I awakened nude and being tied to a bed in a different location. The remainder of that 2 week boy scout camp experience was filled with sexual abuse, much of it while I was tied down. It included torture and continual threats to me to "never tell." With a knife held to my bare chest, I was told that if I ever told he would find me and kill me. There was torture with the explanation: 'This is what it feels like to die'. If you tell you will die. There were other gross things as described in my pufferfish story part 5. I witnessed what I believed to be the killing of another boy. I was told the same would or could happen to me.

Still another part of my story relates to Shawn Hornbeck's abuse. If my memory serves me well, there were days in which I was not physically restrained. I was mentally captive in the same way Shawn was. As has been pointed out, abusers know how to terrorize their young subjects to the point they are held mentally captive. That captivity remained for many years after the 2-week camp terminated. There was some kind of fear and terror which was drilled into me which I have only recently begun to feel free of.

When I later remembered this abuse when I was in my 40's, I felt really bad and ashamed that there were days where I was not physically restrained. Why didn't I escape? Why didn't I try to get some help? Actually When the abuse first started I did go to the camp doctor and told him. Nothing happened as a result in fact the abuse got much worse. Where could I go?

Allen

pufferfish whistle




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#302416 - 09/10/09 11:46 AM Re: Shawn Hornbeck tonight on NBC 48 hours 9/5/09 [Re: pufferfish]
DJsport Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
Hi, Allen.

You said "where could I go?". To me that is the ultimate question and terror I connect with.

I am really "feeling" or empathizing with the affects of being "captive". The helpless terrified feeling that we do not know what to do with or slow to respond to.

Thanks for sharing your story.

I believe the media is getting it albeit not as fast as we would like.

Peace,
DJ

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Never make someone a priority if your only an option

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