I do this before the beginning of every school year -- I make this promise to my self to do better. Not just better academically, but better in all aspects of my life. I want to do better in school because I seriously need to, but I want to do better socially also. This entire summer has been one big waste, four months spent inside of my house watching tv. I have arguably one of the coolest cell phones in the world and it never rings unless it's my mom calling for a quick question or a bill collector or something. I have to do better that this.

So here come my promises:

*I promise to take the initiative to bring my grades up and to not be afraid to ask for and seek out help when I need it.

*I promise to not only try my best but, even when it hurts and even when everything inside and outside of me is pulling me away, to do whatever work I have to do in a timely and professional manner.

*I promise to not use my depression as a crutch or an excuse and to not let the hands of procrastination hold me like they've do so many times before.

*I promise to try my hardest to make friends because I know there are a multitude of people who would love to have a new friend like me.

*Most of all, I promise to give myself a chance to be happy simply because I deserve it.

Like I said, I say these things to myself every year and every year it's always the same: I'm failing in school, in social status and in life in general. I want to change because I am worth it (not being big-headed). I do deserve to have friends and to have fun. It doesn't mean that I have to get high or drunk or go crazy, it just means that I deserve to live, not just survive.

I would love any input or advice you guys could offer.

Wish me luck,
Terrick

terrick, so very much pressure my friend. maybe a little time to step away from all these "have too's"? create a space where you can breathe and get a fresh perspective on what you truly need for your life, rather than what you think is needed.

i know for your age the pressure is high to succeed and to advance your own position. but sometimes you just have to step back and accept limitations temporarily. i am doing that right now as i soon turn 56. CSA sucks!

just some thoughts......

ron

.

I agree with Danny & Ron.

I'm in a similar boat about trying to want to better myself, make significant changes.

How about focusing on maybe just one of those ideas, maybe 2 if your feeling enthusiastic.

I agree about putting pressure on yourself, I do it all the time and I think its part of why I hold myself back.

Good luck to you in this journey Terrick.

Charles

Thanks guys for the input. I guess maybe that's my problem: I'm trying to do too much. I could just focus on one or two instead of all at the same time. I know from past experience that I can't handle the overload. Thanks.

Terrick

HI, MY FRATERNAL BROTHER.

Quite a list for sure. Lots of hope too.

But, you have already finished one of your assigned tasks.

But you didn't see it.

It's your promise to try your hardest to make friends because I (you) know there are a multitude of people who would love to have a friend like me (you).

Well Terrick, I am one of those multitudes, and if you look to your left to the side bar you have 6896 more.

And right here you have 3+ me more, and this is just a starter.

We here offer our fraternal brother, our compassion, understanding and love.

Here you have true friends, my fraternal brothers, and for some my fraternal family.

Sure can't beat that.

Heal well my fraternal brother..friend, Terrick// wish you luck on those other promises.

" I will take that lost boys hand, and i will lead him fromthe depths of darkness, unto the sunlight, forever into eternity".

Little Pete & big Pete..but 1 (Irishmoose).

Well yesterday was the first day of classes. I missed it because I took some sleep meds (still got that sleeping problem) and woke up late. Stupid me. But today is my second day and although it's only 11 am and I've only gone to one class so far I do feel good. And since there soooooo many new people hopefully I'll make some new friends.

I did manage to keep one promise: the one about procrastination. I'm in the financial aid office waiting to talk to an advisor. It's a big step for me because before I would have been afraid and would have put it off and put it off and put it off. But here I am.

And thanks Pete, the more brothers the better.

Terrick.