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#299166 - 08/13/09 03:13 PM How do I involve my partner in my healing process
BlairSW Offline


Registered: 08/13/09
Posts: 5
Loc: Canada
I often feel alone and isolated in my healing process. Due to my abuse I feel numb, like I don't feel my partner's love. How can I involve him in my healing process? How do I feel love again?


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#299170 - 08/13/09 03:31 PM Re: How do I involve my partner in my healing process [Re: BlairSW]
DJsport Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
Hi, Blair.

I would share as much as you want with him. He may or maynot want more information. You may not want to share. You can share information, stories, fun times, healing times, etc.

I would say the healthiest way to share is to stay present and have him be a source of fun and encouragement and joy and LOVE.
Being there for him would be a great thing as you are able.

In any sense, you are not obligated to share.

There are some books for both you and him - of course he would read the sections on family, partners, friends: Victims No Longer by Mike Lew, Abused Boys by Mic Hunter or Ghost in the Bedroom.

He can also sign up here for there is a section for families and friends on here.

I may take sometime to feel loved again. For me I had to learn to love as I dealt with the memories of the abuse.

Keep coming back,

Peace,
DJ

_________________________
Live to your fullest potential

Never make someone a priority if your only an option

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#299345 - 08/14/09 08:06 PM Re: How do I involve my partner in my healing process [Re: DJsport]
seeker43 Offline


Registered: 06/12/09
Posts: 34
Loc: jalisco, mexico
Hi Blair, when I first started to deal with what happened in my life I felt exactly the same way. I couldn`t feel his love or believe his words or let his holding be of any comfort. I pushed him away and eventually out the door. That was a long time ago. I`ve tried to find him since to let him know......that, well just to let him know I know it wasn`t anything he did or didn`t do. I know this is kind of rambling. I guess what I`m trying to get around to is try to believe him and feel his love and be comforted. I wasn`t able to and I regret it. Best of luck, Scott


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#299424 - 08/15/09 07:03 PM Re: How do I involve my partner in my healing process [Re: seeker43]
BlairSW Offline


Registered: 08/13/09
Posts: 5
Loc: Canada
Thanks to the both of you for your insights. I am very thankful.


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#300345 - 08/23/09 11:47 PM Re: How do I involve my partner in my healing process [Re: BlairSW]
MFKjr Offline


Registered: 05/22/09
Posts: 37
Loc: Boston, Ma
I think you need to take it day by day, and minute by minute, open up a dialogue and open that door a little each day...ir feels good after awhile.


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