Dear brother Robbie,
For some time now, I have followed your recent posts with a growing concern for the obviously excruciating pain that you are going through. I have not known quite what to say, so now I will just say it simply: I care about you, and I'm concerned for you.
A diamond does not revert to being a lump of coal, just because the diamond has some cracks and carbon stains (did you know that all diamond have flaws like these, and so do all humans?). The diamond is still ultra-hard, unique, and valuable. For all of its flaws, it never loses its diamond-ness. It is still a jewel, and so are you!
Robbie, you are like a vintage Ferrari with some dents and scratches on the paint, but that does not mean you should just write yourself off and sell yourself to the junk yard! The very marks of its age and antiquity and its used status makes the vintage Ferrari even more valuable! In like manner, you are still valuable! God will still love you and send you people who will love you! He who sees every sparrow that falls from the sky will not forget His wounded children! Please resist Satan's lie that because you are hurting as a survivor that therefore you are somehow inferior "damaged goods" which deserve rejection! IT'S JUST NOT TRUE! Please, instead consider the song that our brother Shadow+Walker just posted: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRBW60sLbfU
"Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you."
"When my father and my mother forsake me [wife, in this case], then the LORD will take me up. " (Psalms 27:10)
Above you asked, "WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME HOW I'M DIFFERENT FROM THE WOUNDED RABIT?". Here it is: Shot rabbits maybe abandoned, and horses are shot for having broken legs, but children are not. We love on them till they are healed, and after that time, too. Please let us love on you until you heal as well, and after that time, too.
Your brother in Christ,