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#286412 - 05/05/09 09:25 PM Re: Is there a God? [Re: myboyhoodfears]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
intelligent design, macrocosms, microcosms....whatever you wanna call 'it', beyond all appearances, our god is an awesome god. yet, how all dichotomies can arise and exist at once is beyond fathoming and will ever remain a mystery to us mere mortals. try as we may, we'll never understand the heights and depths of the mysteries of god, but we can know god through relationship. in the parallels of the physical to the spiritual senses we can, and indeed have seen, heard, and tasted the palpable goodness and sweetness of god. for me, beyond that, nothing else is needed.

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#286413 - 05/05/09 09:42 PM Re: Is there a God? [Re: Sans Logos]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6867
Loc: USA
Amen.

Allen

pufferfish whistle


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#286680 - 05/07/09 10:35 PM Re: Is there a God? [Re: pufferfish]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 1989
Loc: durham, north england
there was a point when I absolutely believed in God.

At the age of 7 I lost the sight of my right eye. some days later, I sat down in the hospital chapel and had a sort of experience i couldn't explain, an experience of something both beyond the world and intimately connected with it, an experience of a presence which was not myself, was infinite (or at least felt that way), and yet incredibly personally with me at that point.

I'd heard about God having parents who were Christian, had been to Church etc, and had wondered about life after death etc, but this was the first direct experience I had.

For the next four years, ---- while in fact my mum did a degree in heology and tried to become ordaned I was incredibly interested in devine and spiritual matters.

I studdied comparative religions, went to some of my mum's lectures and read various theology books, ---- including pilgrim's progress. At that stage I also wanted to bbecome a priest.

then, at age 12 my abuse started. For the next three years I had to concentrate only upon survival, and didn't particularly think about God beyond memories of what had happened to me at age 7.

Once I got out of that situation, things started to pick up again. I started studdying more comparative religions, ---- chatted to everyone from Christians to Muslims to buhdists and Wickens, ---- and in fact very nearly studdied theology instead of philosophy.

More than that, I even had a couple of miner echoes of what I'd first experienced at the age of 7, ---- particularly as I started to practice meditation.

Slowly however over time, things changed. My beliefs and understandings of God become tacit rather than active. They were theological positions I held in debates, no longer ideas or thought that had any force or relation to my life.

The further I slipped into depression, the more distant my sense of God seemed to get. When I realized this I tries several of the old techniques such as meditation and prayer, and reread some of those old theological books.

but nothing.

the last straw came last year when I was debating theology with someone and suddenly realized it was just words, ----- a language game in the best Witkenstein tradition.

Now I'm something close to an agnostic. My experiences seem like distant memories with no force, ---- maybe I was wrong.

I've tried to seak the sense of God I once had, ---- but found nothing. I've tried to ask for help, ---- and found nothing.

right now I simply do not know. Perhaps it is I who have gone away from God, ---- in which case, where the heck is the loving, supportive being I first believed in at the age of 7.

I don't want to take the step into full agnosticism of saying that God might not exist, ---- but right now I'm very close to it indeed.

Ps: I use the term "god" simply for convenience. even at my most spiritual, I was a universalist rather than exclusively a Christian.


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#286682 - 05/07/09 11:32 PM Re: Is there a God? [Re: dark empathy]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Luke,

Read the prodical son story.
God is but waiting for you to return to him.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#286684 - 05/08/09 12:20 AM Re: Is there a God? [Re: michael banks]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6867
Loc: USA
Jesus said: The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. But I am come that they might have have life and have it more abundantly. John 10:10b

Allen

pufferfish whistle


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#286722 - 05/08/09 07:25 AM Re: Is there a God? [Re: pufferfish]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 1989
Loc: durham, north england
Thanks for the responses, but I'm utterly confused as to how i'm supposed to return to God if I have no sense that God is even there.

As I said, I've tried all the old methods of being in touch with God and nothing has worked.


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#286739 - 05/08/09 10:46 AM Re: Is there a God? [Re: dark empathy]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
Luke,
Sometimes God is standing so close to us that we overlook him in our search.

Sometimes like a picture on the wall he has been there so long we no longer even see him. But he is there, waiting till we are ready to listen and accept him as he is and not as we would like him to be.

As CS Lewis once said, he is not a tame lion.


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#286803 - 05/08/09 11:55 PM Re: Is there a God? [Re: Marcus Mystery]
profryr1974 Offline


Registered: 05/07/09
Posts: 9
Loc: arizona
Mike, and Allan I would have to say that I agree with you both. While my commitment is very much to order and relate to the world in a way that has at it's sustaining creative center a God and furthermore I am way keen on the whole christianity thing I also find tremendous meaning in this faith in large part because within its>
_________________________
RYR1974

"I have not hands to stop every mouth so there is nothing but to speak the truth and trust God." Queen Elizabeth I

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#286861 - 05/09/09 12:24 PM Re: Is there a God? [Re: profryr1974]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
Quote:
then the God I follow opens the door - what ever that would mean and waits on us to reconcile.


profryr1974 i love your post, so eloquently expressed and insightful.

_________________________
Post Nubilia Pheobus

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#286868 - 05/09/09 01:02 PM Re: Is there a God? [Re: myboyhoodfears]
profryr1974 Offline


Registered: 05/07/09
Posts: 9
Loc: arizona
Thanks for that.

_________________________
RYR1974

"I have not hands to stop every mouth so there is nothing but to speak the truth and trust God." Queen Elizabeth I

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