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#283206 - 04/10/09 11:23 PM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: cjb]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Sorry Will reframe from furhter response.

If someone hit on you. report it to the mods

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#283222 - 04/11/09 02:20 AM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: michael banks]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Cliff,

All's well that ends well.
Really enjoyed talking to you tonight.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#283223 - 04/11/09 02:29 AM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: michael banks]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
Cjb,
The symptoms you are descirbing are serious but can be treated and inprove the quality of your life considerably. I would suggest a consultation with the appropriate surgeon and anestheiologist. As best you can make known your concerns and fears regarding these procedures. There are things they can do to eliminate the effects you are fearing and allow proper treatment of your conditions. If you feel you cannot properly communicate in person verbally then copy your post and give it to them. Trust me they are very compassionate regarding these things normally and will go to extremes to make this as painless for you as possible, literally and figuratively. I work with some of these guys and I can attest to that.

My abuse was no where near as horrific as yours. I am very sad that this has happened to such a nice guy, husband and father. Please think about this. You deserve it and your kids and wife will be glad their dad and husband is not suffering any longer physically because of the abuse.

Take care



Edited by Freedom49 (04/11/09 02:30 AM)

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#283229 - 04/11/09 07:14 AM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: Freedom49]
frozen Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/26/07
Posts: 22
Loc: Europe
Hi,Cjb
I was too reaped several times violently, during my long abuse.My first abuser treated me like specimen,I also had bottle inside,My second abuser was just cruell and mean he got kicks when he hurt.
I have had leaking problem since 15(26 years now).I tried to ingnore it,change clothes etc.But it is bit difficult to ignore if you have pants full of crap and you smell.
My kids made joke of me: Whats smelling? Is it little bro ?No,its you dad!
I started wearing diaper,it helps a lot controlling leaks.
My wife and my shrink convinced me to go to doctor,so I went.
I was send to University hospital .All docks were professionalls,they made me differend kinds of tests ,some were not very nice,but not as bad you would think.After all they treated me very well,like human.
I was diagnosed:bowell incontinent.I got new pills to control my bowells(have helped a bit) and I am still wearing diaper.
In my case,there is no better treatment.
Bigger problem is .when I change diaper I remember him who caused everything.
I hope you got some answers.
Take care!


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#283336 - 04/12/09 01:58 AM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: frozen]
cjb Offline


Registered: 04/08/09
Posts: 19
Loc: Oregon, USA
I'm sorry, Frozen. That sounds awful. Fortunately, I don't have that problem, just alot of pain.

I'll work it out.

_________________________
"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." - Jim Elliot

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#283405 - 04/12/09 05:21 PM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: joelRT]
Raybie Offline


Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 1
Loc: London, Ohio USA
Hi. This is my first post here so I may be out of line but this is in reply to JoeIRT. He said "Many have tried to go it alone and ALL have failed. You need to be working with a therapsit who is specialized in male CSA issues." I am 54 years old and have been a survivor of CSA without the help of a specialized therapist. That has never been available to me (until maybe now). I have been in therapy groups but mostly for major depression and isolation. I do have flashbacks and nightmares but due to the nature of my abuse I cannot talk to anybody about it. I've been accused of lying or making it all up too many times. My CSA was at the hands of several sick groups of people, not individuals or family members.

I think I will stop here and let others voice their thoughts. Thanks, Raybie

_________________________
As for me and mine, We will follow the Lord.

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#283465 - 04/13/09 01:49 AM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: Raybie]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Hey Ray:

Welcome to our support site. Gald that you found us. I think that you will find us to be a caring and understanding bunch of guys who are all here together trying to find our freedom.

Howard Freidken is in Columbus, I believe, and he is a highly experienced therapist in this field. My 1st attempt at therapy was at Cleveland State University back in the Fall of 1986.

Recovery can be a long road alone, but together with people who understand your path gets a little easier. Hope to see you up on the survivor forum soon. That is where most of the action is.

Recovery is possible. Have hope,

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#283485 - 04/13/09 09:30 AM Re: Physical problems *triggers?* [Re: cjb]
ModTeam Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/06
Posts: 690
Good day fellows,

Quote:
I've had two responses here and in the chatroom:

- judged
- hit on


If this type of thing occurs please note that it is considered a serious infraction of the rules and guidelines for site usage and as such must be reported immediately. We are able to check into reports such as these, but unless someone actually registers a claim it is difficult to monitor such offenses as they occur.

Please do not hesitate to notify us of suspected or confirmed predatory behavior.

When you hear of such things, please let us know. We need your help in keeping this site safe and focused on recovery, and we appreciate your joining us in this work.

Appreciatively,

The ModTeam

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Private messages sent to this account are checked irregularly due to personnel and time constraints. Please send messages to one of the moderators for the forum that is concerned by user name, or if there is no named moderator, send a PM to any moderator.

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