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#279401 - 03/14/09 01:48 AM Sexual Addiction Test
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Guys

Ran across this tonight
thought it could be useful to some.

1.Do you frquently feel remorse,shame, or guilt after a sexual encounter?

2.Do you keep secrets about your sexual activities from those who are important to you? Do you lead a double life?

3.Have you ever felt hopeless or sucidal as a result of your sexual behavior.

4. Have you failed at attempts to stop or reduce your perferred sexual activity?

5.Do you find that you use sex to deal with stress,loneliness,sadness,fear or anger?

6.Are there times when your sexual urges,thoughts, or images seem to control you?

7.Do you find yourself looking for sexually arousing articles or scenes in the media.

8.Do your sexual thoughts about people make it difficult for fully relate to them?

9.Do you spend inordinated time thinking about sex?

10.Does your sexual activity include risk,threat,or reality of disease,pregnacy,coercion or violence?

11.Have you been arrested or are you in danger of arrest because of your sexual behavior?

12.Does your sexual relationships interferre with your spiritual beliefs or development?

13.Have yur relationships been negatively impacted by your sexual activities?

14.Has the need for sex driven you you to associate with people or spend time in places you would not normally choose?

15.Has your work suffered because of your sexual activities?

16.Is sex your most important need?


According to this site if you awswered yes to more than a few questions you should get more info on sexual addiction.

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#279410 - 03/14/09 04:21 AM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: michael banks]
king tut Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/13/08
Posts: 2465
Loc: UK
oh....i answered yes to a few of those

_________________________
"...until lambs become lions"

I love you, little lewis, and i will never leave you. We are the same. You brighten my day, and i will make sure that i brighten yours. Hugs and kisses.


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#279438 - 03/14/09 12:54 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: king tut]
Letourski Offline


Registered: 03/15/08
Posts: 302
Loc: Canada
This is very interesting indeed, I answered yes to many of these questions. Thanks for the information, I will be doing some research now!

_________________________
I am the warrior.

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#279447 - 03/14/09 03:11 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Letourski]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
If I substituted cocaine or cocaine abuse for sex, I had all but 3 of these that do not readily apply to cocaine addiction. And my cocaine addiction was heavily intertwined with my sexual behavior too. Nowadays, with more than 9 years clean off of cocaine, and with my CSA issues largely resolved for some years too, I think that I could answer yes to 1 question and another question involves a less-than clear cut yes or no answer.

So it is 1.5 out of 16 for me, as opposed to 13 out of 16 before starting my 2nd attempt at recovery in 1996.

So there is hope for recovery from sex addiction and cocaine too.

Mark



_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#279450 - 03/14/09 04:09 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Trucker51]
loberhead Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 172
I only answered no to five. frown I feel bad.


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#279451 - 03/14/09 04:24 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Trucker51]
joelRT Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 09/11/08
Posts: 1357
Loc: Québec, Canada
{Post deleted due to violation of site guidelines.}



Edited by ModTeam (03/14/09 10:08 PM)
_________________________
My Story 1
My Story 2
The longest journey we take is to self-discovery

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#279454 - 03/14/09 05:12 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: joelRT]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
As I said, my cocaine addiction and my sexual issues were intertwined.

Just have to let-go and live without your past.

8 years and 10 months ago I left my last group.

And have lived the best years of my life since then.

Yes, recovery is possible.

Mark



Edited by Trucker51 (03/20/09 03:51 AM)
Edit Reason: Apology accepted

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#279462 - 03/14/09 06:50 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Trucker51]
loberhead Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 172
Yikes, that is anger, Joel!! I thought you guys were friends?

I showed my therapist a questionnaire similar to this one that was screening for online sexual addiction. He said they took the questions asked for people addicted to alcohol and re-worded them for the sexual addiction.

People can be addicted to a lot of different things. For example, people can be addicted to volunteering or to shopping. Just because their addiction isn't to illegal drugs or lot of sex doesn't mean it is any less unhealthy or easier to overcome. And this reminds me that it is something I have been working on lately. Just because I have a sex addiction doesn't mean that sex is bad. What's bad is my over-using it in unhealthy ways. I need to figure out how to stop doing this unhealthy thing and I think I can eventually. I hope so.

Drugs are expensive and very addicting. I am sure that people would do ANYTHING to get drugs if they didn't have the money to do so. One of those things might be to sell themselves out on the streets. For an abused individual this may seem very logical ("I'm only good for one thing," "I'll get money doing what I know best" etc.). And so they use money they get by acting out sexually to pay for an addiction.

I'm saying all of these things but I've never been addicted to drugs. I know people who have been and this is what they have done.

I think Mark was simply trying to offer his knowledge in the way he felt he could - by his own experiences. But at the same time I think your anger is important. I'm wondering what is at the core of it.


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#279491 - 03/14/09 10:45 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: loberhead]
Survivinguy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/09
Posts: 310
Loc: Colorado
.



_________________________
Survivinguy

============================================
I have to survive and I hope to thrive.

Alumni Dahlonega WoR May 2010
Alumni Sequoia WoR March 2012

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#279502 - 03/15/09 01:50 AM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Survivinguy]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Like in my post it only states that if you answer yes to more than a few questions that you should get more information on sexual addiction.
That is all.
No where does it state that your answers regardless of what they are means that you are a sex addict.
That is a discision only each person can make for himself.

Just a questionaire that you will find at any sex addicts(SA) meeting.


Surviving

Are you not overreacting a little?
This post has nothing to do with "Said teenager" or his experience.

Mike


_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#279506 - 03/15/09 04:45 AM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: michael banks]
Survivinguy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/09
Posts: 310
Loc: Colorado
.

_________________________
Survivinguy

============================================
I have to survive and I hope to thrive.

Alumni Dahlonega WoR May 2010
Alumni Sequoia WoR March 2012

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#279533 - 03/15/09 12:46 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Survivinguy]
Survivinguy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/09
Posts: 310
Loc: Colorado
I had a post and a response here explaining my post and my opinion that I wasn't overreacting. In the original post I didn't curse or use capitals or shout or anything "over" the top.

I pointed out some issues with the listed questions which Mike has indicated might in some way minimize the issue of sexual addiction. Mike pointed out to me in a PM that sexual addiction can be a very serious, challenging and intertwined issue for CSA survivors.

I agree with Mike and in retrospect - while I was concerned some teen members might struggle with the questions - the questions are no less important.

So after considering Mike's well put private message - I have elected to remove both my original post and my original response.

Thanks Mike - your kind words and gentle manner in your PM in helping me reconsider this issue are much appreciated.

My edited posts probably aren't accurate without indicating what I said in both original posts - I answered yes to more than a few of the questions and am consciously aware of the possibility that if I don't actively address certain habits or activities - it could develop into a very harmful addiction. As I noted to Mike in the PM - I also would never have encountered this questionnaire if Mike hadn't bothered to post it.

Thanks again Mike

_________________________
Survivinguy

============================================
I have to survive and I hope to thrive.

Alumni Dahlonega WoR May 2010
Alumni Sequoia WoR March 2012

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#279536 - 03/15/09 12:53 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Survivinguy]
brother2none Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/30/09
Posts: 262
Loc: Undisclosed
You have my admiration for being able to examine your reactions, so promptly, with honor for yourself and for others. Nice.


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#279579 - 03/15/09 05:27 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: brother2none]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Surviving,

AS I stated in my last pm to you.
I wish you had not deleted anything that you posted here until I could have responded to your pm.
I feel all opinions are important and have the right to be expressed here on M/S.
Even those I may not agree with,like or share.
Because your view of a subject could be as healing for someone here as mine.
In no way do I believe in trying to silience anyone here on M/s for whatever reasons.
Finding our VOICE and learning to express our ideas, feelings,and opinions to me is one of the most important aspects to our recovery.
To realize that we have the right to express ourselves as we feel lead is a fundamental right for all human beings.
Which many of us were stripped of as children because of the behavior of those who supposely taking care of us.

For me one of the most powerful healing aspects of my being a member of M/S has been the oppurtunity to express myself as honestly as I can right now.
And learning that I do not have to apologize for any of it whether others agree with me or not.

In the future please allow the mods to delete objectable posts that is their job.
Because as I said before you never know who you may help from what you have shared. And if you delete it that chance is gone.

Nice talking to you

Mike


_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#280321 - 03/21/09 06:15 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: michael banks]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
I'm a sex addict...pretty sure....but not totally compulsive about it now...i think masturbation is my biggest problem in this area and can be tied to my CSA,...but there seems to be other behaviors not related to the CSA specifically but perhaps to other childhood developmental problems,..although porn has always been a pert of my life...i do not really feel I'm addicted to it....its more of a curiosity for me than anything...it does facilitate masturbation however...and seems to encourage unhealthy self image which i have always had great difficulty with...i have gone through phases where i would continually want to hookup often several times a day...that seemed very much like addictive behavior to me and very self distructive....there were times where i would go to the adult bookstore and cruise for sex the entire day,..unable to get anough..that was very distressing to me....but it seems the need to do that had several implications for me...i felt i used it as a way to prove i was worthy of someones affections even though none of those people really care on bit for me...i seemed to engage in that behavior more when i was very stressed about other things or feeling bad about myself...when i was less stressed i found that i would refrain from it...i really hated what that did to me though...i would become very aggressive and pushy, something i always found rather repulsive in others...i became just like them and it made me sick to my stomache...so i would walk away for a bit and start up again once my revulsion with my self subsided...im still dealing with these inclinations but they have been reduced to a managable level and it seems the more i come to terms with what happened in my childhood the less i need sex to pacify me or to artifically boost my ego.

_________________________
Post Nubilia Pheobus

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#283951 - 04/16/09 11:23 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: myboyhoodfears]
sojourn111 Offline


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 86
Loc: midwest
Good questionaire, a lot of yesses, some no's, a few repressed maybes... damn! I'm going to go eat a steak instead!!


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#290111 - 06/03/09 04:52 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: sojourn111]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
In searching Google for recovering healthy sexuality for men sexually abused as children, I came across this link to a 10 year-old medical research article on the subject of treating Sexual Addiction. Two MD's wrote the article and numerous other works and studies are cited. I thought that the result of their work might be helpful to some here.

Warning: May be ***Triggering*** to some.

Mark

www.sexualrecovery.com/resources/articles/addictivedisorders.doc

Also, you will have to agree to a non-disclosure agreement to view this document.

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#290124 - 06/03/09 05:42 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Trucker51]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Sexual addiction therapist in Denver:

http://www.glowcounseling.com/addiction.html

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#290200 - 06/04/09 04:33 AM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: Trucker51]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Mark,

I can not seem to open this.
What am I do wrong?

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#290209 - 06/04/09 06:23 AM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: michael banks]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
You may need to have Word on your computer to access the Sexualrecovery.com document. When I click on the link a menu comes up asking me to open the document with Word which I have to click on first, then a non-commercial use agreement drops down that you have to click "accept" on to finally open the document, which is 8 pages plus references.

Hope that you have Word on your computer. I have MS Office Professional 2003, which Word is included with.

Mark



Edited by Trucker51 (06/04/09 01:46 PM)
Edit Reason: changed non-disclosure to non-commercial use
_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#290793 - 06/08/09 02:45 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: michael banks]
h.beat,h.break Offline


Registered: 06/05/09
Posts: 124
Loc: New York
I answered yes to about 70-80% of the questions on this list.
The thing about it is that I know it's wrong, I don't really gain anything from the encounters, yet I still do it anyway.

I've tried SA in the past, but I had difficulty trying to relate my problems with the people that were there. It was like I was stopped up or something. Now, I know why frown

_________________________
Hey, if "black sheep" means you're the only non-douche of the family, take that with some pride.

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#293570 - 06/29/09 08:08 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: michael banks]
lostcowboy Offline
Member

Registered: 11/10/04
Posts: 797
Loc: North Texas
Hi Mike if you don't have the money for word/MS office. You can try OpenOffice It is pretty good for the money, its free.

_________________________
"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend." - Albert Camus
Pretty much my life as I have posted so far. Triggers!

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#293574 - 06/29/09 09:03 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: lostcowboy]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Cowboy,

Why do I need it?

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

Top
#293597 - 06/29/09 11:48 PM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: michael banks]
lostcowboy Offline
Member

Registered: 11/10/04
Posts: 797
Loc: North Texas
Mike, you said that you could not open the .doc file. I know that I am coming late to the thread. Been away from the site for a while. Openoffice is very close to being compatible with all of Microsoft's office programs. So if you only need to open up a doc file every once in a while, openoffice should work fine for you. Also it is a free program.

_________________________
"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend." - Albert Camus
Pretty much my life as I have posted so far. Triggers!

Top
#293620 - 06/30/09 07:09 AM Re: Sexual Addiction Test [Re: lostcowboy]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Cowboy,

true;y thank you for tha info.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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