Brother and Katie,
Is not being use as an object for sexual pleasure of another person the #1 lesson that we learn as sexual abuse victims.
I bet 99.9 percent of the men here have issues with objectation
of others for their sexual pleasure.
Alot of times in order for me to orgasm during sex I have to conciously in my mind view my wife as an sexual object and not as a person.
My isssues with porn stem from this very same issue. In alot of porn women are view as nothing more than sexual objects for the pleasure of men.
It is all about one persons pleasure with no real regards for the feelings or needs of the other person. that sexs and emotions do not mix.
It is a twisted view of sexually but one alot of us survivors must come to grasp in order to heal from our abuse.
I know that I am struggling with it in my life.
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun
WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009