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#274264 - 02/06/09 11:02 PM my birthday
1love4christ Offline


Registered: 12/18/08
Posts: 46
Loc: ca, usa
hi family,

I just wanted to share with you that don't know that my birthday is today. I say this because I acknowledge through my mind my worth Jesus Christ says I have but struggle with my heart truly receiving it. I'm expressing the pain i've struggled with in my life and as i've reflected my life, i'm thinking of too many trials.

I just recently broke down in tears submitting to my lord how much I am ashamed of how much I doubt him at times. I cry for understanding and am desperate for the light of jesus christ. I hate myself any time I have my abuse or trauma affect my relationship with my lord. And I get emotional like crazy with tears and anger about my frustrations. I realized that although i'm alone physically, I am not alone spiritually. I also accept that just because I can't see jesus christ, it doesn't mean he is not with me. I can feel him smiling on me as I think about this but its hard to accept how distant I come to him. it breaks my heart and only hope for his understanding, yet bringing me to more tears to know that my lord does love me.


feb. 6, 1984
25 years of life
I onced told god in prayer at the age of 6 that I would be lucky to live past 19 and live a worthy life of love. Now, I'm 25 today and married to a christian woman. We are trying to have kids and accepting this blessing in my life is still hard.

thanks family

_________________________
nestor

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#274271 - 02/06/09 11:55 PM Re: my birthday [Re: 1love4christ]
TJ jeff Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/07/04
Posts: 3362
Loc: Northern Wisconsin
Happy Birthday Nestor

_________________________
Who will cry for the little boy? - I will... - Antwone Fisher

Abuse happens in silence/isolation - Recovery happens only when that silence/isolation is broken...

TJ's History

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#274274 - 02/07/09 12:29 AM Re: my birthday [Re: TJ jeff]
petercorbett Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2433
Loc: TEXAS
Well Nestor,
I'm sorry that i'm a day late and a dollar short, as a term that I used to use.
Happy birthday. Heal well, my friend/brother.
Pete (Irishmoose)

_________________________
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
____________________________________________________________
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.


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#274320 - 02/07/09 10:48 AM Re: my birthday [Re: 1love4christ]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
((((nestor)))) happy birthday!

i've revisited your story and i am struck by the unequivocal 'other-worldly' tones of your writing. there is something extraordinary about you, and we are so very blest to have you as part of our community. i am so glad you are here with us.

all the best from your other brother from a different mother, same father,

ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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