This is just me and I'm not speaking for all male survivors
here, but if I am to share the details of my flashback or even just impart that I've had one - I don't want my partner's feedback.
What I want is to be heard, understood that I'm going through a rough patch, trusted that I can and will work it out - what I don't want is to have a discussion about it.
Just give me the space I need to find my balance again.
I am not your husband (oh, you lucky girl
) and I am not speaking for him, but I'm wondering if perhaps you aren't asking him the right question in the wrong way.
What can I do to help him feel better? I've asked him, but he says he doesn't know.
I fully understand that your aim is to help, and he is indeed fortunate that you care enough to want to help. But, dear girl, there is nothing that you can do
to help fix this for him.
Perhaps if you tried: "Can you tell me what you need from me in this moment?", you might just get the answer that you are looking for.
Mama, I hope this helps, and please keep in mind that all this is just one guy's opinion.