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#282012 - 04/02/09 11:28 PM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: Sans Logos]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
i read through the thread,...what about heterosexual marriage success rates?...i don't see that as relevant,..they are completely sociologically influenced...and vary dramatically from culture to culture. the question "fixing homosexuality?" is relevant on a biological level only, which is the point of my earlier post. "fixing heterosexuality? on the other hand is a matter of fixing society's perceptions of marriage, provided we are really asking why heterosexual marriages are not successful in this particular society. but if we are asking if heterosexual attractions in general have a biological purpose then the answer is already established as "yes".



Edited by myboyhoodfears (04/02/09 11:40 PM)
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#282013 - 04/02/09 11:28 PM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: Sans Logos]
Jethro8 Offline


Registered: 03/16/09
Posts: 29

Hi Ron,

All is forgiven. We have cleared that and now move on.
In my post i was rationalising why, if i chose to live hetero married to my wife, do i have stronger ssa in my fantasies.
Another point i could add to it is that in my acting out, my first 10+ sexual encounters include my csa plus casual sex with males That would probably establish a pattern.
Just processing stuff.

Jethro


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#282021 - 04/02/09 11:57 PM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: Jethro8]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
Quote:
if i chose to live hetero married to my wife, do i have stronger ssa in my fantasies.


well that's another story.

why do we see sexual magnetism as a deal breaker? is it not possible to merely make a choice in a partner [ ie wife or significant other], and be loyal to the committment, to that choice, yet still find other options attractive without recrimination?

yes it has been said that 'sinning' in the heart is the same as performing the act in real life?

ok, jesus. but at least give credit for choosing to remain faithful physically. i mean after all, if you were not jesus, you'd be in the same boat as we are.

...btw, you know i love you.....noogies to jesus

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#282056 - 04/03/09 05:36 AM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: Sans Logos]
Jethro8 Offline


Registered: 03/16/09
Posts: 29

Ron,

You cracked me up.

Maybe now I can ponder why my favourite colour is blue and I don't like pink. lol

Our friendship is flourishing

Jethro


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#282080 - 04/03/09 10:10 AM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: myboyhoodfears]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
Quote:
heterosexual attractions in general have a biological purpose then the answer is already established as "yes".


i can certainly agree with that statement dan. but it seems to me that your arguments around it rest on many prior assumptions which are really based more in conjecture than substance.

not everyone shares the opinion that sex is only for purposes of population. i know i don't, so that statement is true.

i guess i am more concerned as to why this is something that you feel compelled to convince. not trying to be argumentative, but do you perhaps feel threatened by the idea that people don't fit into nice neat little boxes?

ron

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#282086 - 04/03/09 11:05 AM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: myshoeisonfire]
Jethro8 Offline


Registered: 03/16/09
Posts: 29

The fact that this thread has reached page 7 pages says one thing for sure. Whether homosexual, heterosexual or shades of each. As men we are sexual beings.
I haven't done biology for decades but isn't testosterone the hormone for sex drive, and men have ten times the amount as women.
On a female survivors site I wonder if the topic would initiate even seven responses let alone seven pages.
Is frigidity a common response for females.
If a man was castrated physically or chemically would he no longer have "compelling" sexual identity issues.
I have taken it back to the basic level, hormonal, removing the genetic or social factors to get some thought because reading thru this thread my mind was overwhelmed.

Jethro


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#282091 - 04/03/09 12:14 PM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: Jethro8]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
Quote:
testosterone the hormone for sex drive, and men have ten times the amount as women.
yea something like that, but there we go again, making black and white statements! it's so hard not to do! shocked i have a female friend who i have known for over 50 years! yes we grew up as next door neighbors. she has a very manly appearance. what did she do to make that happen? nothing. it was her genetic gift.

i liked the pink and blue you mentioned jeff.....now that sounds like a thesis worthy of extrapolation. crazy

ron laugh

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#282117 - 04/03/09 03:43 PM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: Sans Logos]
Jethro8 Offline


Registered: 03/16/09
Posts: 29
Ron,

I smashed those monuments of my black and white upbringing but alas no matter how much I sweep, there is still traces of dust in the crevices. I'm slowly learning, you are teaching me well. Be patient I'm a high school drop out you know.

So, not thinking black and white. On the topic of csa effects on sexual identity I see six billion plus people all infinitely unique. With this thought I am awestruck, what can I say!

Jeff





Edited by Jethro8 (04/03/09 04:07 PM)
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#282130 - 04/03/09 06:24 PM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: Sans Logos]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
"
Quote:
but do you perhaps feel threatened by the idea that people don't fit into nice neat little boxes?
"

no not at all, lol....i certainly don't fit in any neat little box.

i was only responding to "fixing heterosexuality" which i thought was a funny but absurd statement...im only really referring to the biological purposes of attractions in a general sense, which really is a separate issue than ones personal choice to engage in sexual behavior to avoid having children.

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#282168 - 04/03/09 11:37 PM Re: CSA effects on sexual identity [Re: myboyhoodfears]
Jim1961 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/10/09
Posts: 1099
Loc: Pa, but likely traveling...
My sister and I talked for two hours on the phone about our pasts (we grew up with many of the same family issues). We shared many secrets.

She knew me better in many ways than I knew myself as a teenager because I was drugged up so much, and can't remember. She was well aware of my drug abuse, suicidal thoughts and my "coming out" as gay at age 19.

I told her that due to this site and discussions with T, I was questioning my belief that I was born bisexual and that maybe the porn/CSA caused it. Her reaction was, of course not you are straight for sure! I was surprised by her answer. It was very interesting to get her perspective.

Jim

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