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#269959 - 01/05/09 03:37 PM CSA meetings
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
I was talking to another guy in chat today.
The topic of having some type of meeting for survivors like alcoholics have in AA came up.
Why is there not places like AA meetings for us survivors. Why are we not reaching out to each other as they did. Is our problems and situation so unlike theirs. Maybe they have provide the blue print for something we can build for ourselves. Alot of us have found the first taste of freedom thru AA and other groups.

If we don't reach out to those who still are hurting and lost then who. Is it not healing for both parties when we reach out to others. Would it not be easier for those in isolation from sexual abuse to come out of it in a place full of former isolators/survivors. Could we not come out futher from our own isolation by reaching out and helping others.

I find alot of help here in M/S. How much more help could we find and give each other in face to face encounters. Why can we not to come together and grow. Why have we not yet come together to grow?
I live in So.Cal. and would be willing to travel to attend and meet other survivors in the region.

What do you think?
Could we do this?
What do we got to loss?
If you are interested would you care to do this?
Is this too big of a dream.
Let me know.

Mike

Sorry if i placed this thread in the wrong place.



_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#269965 - 01/05/09 03:59 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: michael banks]
wes-b Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/17/07
Posts: 438
Loc: Western, Canada

Mike;

there is Survivors of Incest Anonymous, which is a 12 step group, http://www.siawso.org/ I have the sense that they are not readily everywhere that they are needed. And, SIA does not include all of us at MS... but I expect they would be a good place to enquire for those not abused by family members.

Peace, Love and Hope, Wes

_________________________
Happy to be a recovering survivor. :-)

Continuing to meet more of my fellows as I "Trudge the Road of Happy Destiny".

My Story, 1st pass

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#269966 - 01/05/09 04:00 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: michael banks]
joelRT Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 09/11/08
Posts: 1357
Loc: Québec, Canada
Mike,

It is amazing to discover that when we open up, in twelve step recovery programs, and expose frankly that we are survivors how many other people make the same admission. I do believe that that is the best place to start a group.

Years ago, I was part of an ACA group. Someone mentioned in passing while sharing that they had been sexually abused as a child. The direction of the meeting did a full three-sixty and became about child abuse. Of the approximatly twenty of us around the table, the majority had the same story to relate.

Many treatement centers for substance abuse estimate that roughly 90% of their clientele are former sex abuse victims which has led directly to their substance abuse issues.

I remember when I was in treatement for an addiction to codeine that a woman dared to share that she was gender confused and then went on to say that she had been repeatedly raped from the age of three - yep, you guessed it, most of us had a similar story to tell.

I guess the only question is : Who amongst us is going to sit down and formulate a working format for former CSA victims adapted from the twelve step one that we know so well.

_________________________
My Story 1
My Story 2
The longest journey we take is to self-discovery

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#269967 - 01/05/09 04:02 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: joelRT]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
KeithR is also looking for a support group in Las Vegas. I suggested that you could meet him halfway, which would be around Baker.

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#269968 - 01/05/09 04:05 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: wes-b]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Wes,

My question is why do we not have a support network for ourselves. It is not as if it is not needed. But it is just not there yet.

WHY?

WHEN?

Mike



_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#269969 - 01/05/09 04:14 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: michael banks]
wes-b Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/17/07
Posts: 438
Loc: Western, Canada

Thx Mike,

I see that now.. I also see that you appear to have struck a chord ;-)

I just peeked at the SIA site and they look to be fairly sparse, and the phone meetings predominately say Women only... which leads me to think that there is a paucity of male survivors in SIA...

that said SIA may be a resource for lit that is close to what an MS 12step would net out like.

Wes

_________________________
Happy to be a recovering survivor. :-)

Continuing to meet more of my fellows as I "Trudge the Road of Happy Destiny".

My Story, 1st pass

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#269970 - 01/05/09 04:19 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: wes-b]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Wes,

It would not nessscarily have to be 12-step connected just recovery oriented. Too make it available to as many as possible.
That all could be worked out. the point being to have a place for survivors to meet each other and to heal.
Why can't this be done?
Why are we not doing it now?

Mike



_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#269971 - 01/05/09 04:37 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: michael banks]
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
Many guys use the classifed section to look for or announce the formation of peer support groups for survivors. I have started one that meets in the Tampa bay area of Florida. Feel free to PM me if you are interested in starting a group.

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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#269992 - 01/05/09 07:35 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: michael banks]
mike5 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/01/07
Posts: 170
Loc: Cleveland, OH
Originally Posted By: michael banks
Why can't this be done?
Why are we not doing it now?


No reason it can't be done. As to why we are not doing it, I think that some are doing it. There are several meetings around the world that were put together by MaleSurvivor members. I've been talking about starting something in my area for a long time, but keep getting sidetracked by fear that it will not be safe, or it'll be too much work, or no one will be interested, or this that and the other thing. The more we talk about our experiences with support groups and the more groups we start, the easier it will be for me to get past that fear cool

You have inspired me to finally start a group, rather than continue to think about starting one! I've put a message about this new group in Indianapolis in the classified section of the forum.

Thanks for sparking me to do this Mike!

Happy New Year!

Mike


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#269994 - 01/05/09 07:51 PM Re: CSA meetings [Re: mike5]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
We in Colorado have a support organization for CSA survivors.

Wings Foundation Inc. is an organization that assists adults to reduce the trauma of CSA, through therapists-facilitated meetings on a weekly basis.

My group meets every Tuesday evening for 2 hours. I am so very thankful for the support of other CSA survivors that I can talk to every week.

I do agree with all of you. Support groups would be so helpful for all of us.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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