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#264637 - 12/01/08 12:00 PM ADD/ADHD
fromtoday Offline


Registered: 10/04/08
Posts: 74
Loc: UK
Hi All,

I'm hoping that Im allowed to post here because I'm a wife of a CSA man.

I had a quick search on the site regarding ADD/ADHD because I'm interested to know if anybody on this site has any experience in this area.

I will just give a brief history so you know where Im coming from.

My husband has experienced mental health problems since teenage years, he's now in his thirties, 2 years ago he had a mental breakdown forcing foward CSA issues which had always influenced him. He embarked on therapy and made major changes, we naively hoped that there may be a light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently he has stopped therapy, a decision approved by this therapist, he felt that although he was still experiencing problems he wasn't acheieving anything in therapy so it was agreed to take an open ended break.

Since then due to other events its been suggested that my husband may suffer from ADD, the more we read the more it fits with his lifestory, although I have to admit that many of the symptoms overlap with those of CSA as many mental health problems do, he's been refered to a specialist which he is waiting to see, we are both finding this very difficult to handle, I don't want to sound like we are minimising the effects of CSA but we both felt like it was potentially overcomable, now though we feel as though, well this is it forever, the forgetfulness, disociation, emotional detachment.

He's taken a dive in his wellbeing because he can't handle being who he is, frustrated about his own behaviours and once again I've got to hold it together for us all,

Any experience that you have about ADD/ADHD and possible interations with CSA are much appreciated.

Thx

_________________________
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide,
No escape from reality
Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see.....
_________________________________________________
Queen, Bohemian Rhapsody

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#264671 - 12/01/08 04:11 PM Re: ADD/ADHD [Re: fromtoday]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Ken Singer (on our site) suggested a while back that some therapists will intentionally misdiagnose the effects of dissociation as ADD in order to get paid. There are some tests for ADD, one of which I flunked in spectacular fashion. I had to sit there inside of a dark hood and push a button every time some pinprick of light flashed on the screen in front of me. I must have missed half of them. But the result also indicates the possibility of being affected with dissociation, which is a milder symptom of PTSD too, just as much as it indicates the possibility of ADD.

The Hazelden Foundation in Minnesota put out a good videotape on ADD, its symptoms, and strategies to deal with the affliction, back in the mid-1990s, and I would let you borrow it, but my last therapist forgot to give it back to me. I suspect that you could order another copy from Hazelden at (800) 257-7800, or online from their library or their mental health department. Hazelden is a long-established and influential substance-abuse treatment facility based out of Center City, MN.

There are various drugs to combat the effects of ADD like Welbutrin or Cymbalta. It can take several weeks of taking one of these drugs to begin to see much improvement if the problem is indeed ADD. Dissociation shares similar symptoms with ADD. I still have some problems drifting off in conversation, and always have to put various items in the same place so that I don't lose them. I always have to make lists so that I don't forget stuff. I can remember having lots of problems with forgetfulness and loosing things early in grade school as well as the frustration that went along with it. These symptoms have only been partially resolved for me through the use of medications.

You might look at Mic Hunter's book ABUSED BOYS or Mike Lew's book VICTIMS NO LONGER, because both contain sections dealing with the effects of dissociation. Both books are available through our own bookstore off of the homepage. Another book that I found helpful in my own recovery was SELF ESTEEM, by Matthew McKay, PH.D. Your husband has to begin to resolve his shame issues before he can begin to make much progress on his self-esteem issues though. And constantly loosing or forgetting things just doesn't help, I know. It makes me feel small myself, and has started the whole self-directed anger spiral all over again.

There was a good topic on the public survivor forum maybe 10 days ago about dealing with shame. Maybe you should try to look it up too.

Hope that this was helpful to your situation,

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#264854 - 12/02/08 07:07 AM Re: ADD/ADHD [Re: Trucker51]
fromtoday Offline


Registered: 10/04/08
Posts: 74
Loc: UK
Hi Mark,

Yes, thats helpful thankyou. I will have a good look at the resources you mention.

We are in the UK, here ADD in adults is largely unrecognised, my husband has only been refered because our son is already under diagnosis for ADHD, his doctor picked up on my husbands issues and wanted to look at it as a line of enquiry.

The thing we find difficult is assuming he is ADD, whats the ADD, CSA, Disociation, PTSD, depression, anxiety, stress etc... and if we don't know which avenue the behaviour stems from how do we tackle it.

Never simple!!

Much Love

S

_________________________
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide,
No escape from reality
Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see.....
_________________________________________________
Queen, Bohemian Rhapsody

Top
#267549 - 12/17/08 01:30 PM Re: ADD/ADHD [Re: fromtoday]
jacob77 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 02/19/05
Posts: 37
Loc: Northern CA
Fromtoday,
I highly recommend Dr. Daniel Amen's book,Healing ADD. He also has an excellent website called:amenclinics.com.
Hope it helps. His books have helped me greatly with my depression.

Jacob

_________________________
I am good enough.

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