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#264839 - 12/02/08 01:53 AM .
bardo213 Offline
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Registered: 11/21/07
Posts: 811
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Edited by bardo213 (06/21/13 06:52 PM)

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#264840 - 12/02/08 02:12 AM Re: the past 4yrs.... [Re: bardo213]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Lynch,

Very inspiring.
Thanks for all the openness of your issues that you have been dealing with here at M/S.
You set a clear path for the rest of us to follow.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#264945 - 12/02/08 09:54 PM Re: the past 4yrs.... [Re: michael banks]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Keep up he good work, my man, we are all behind you. Congrats on your 6 months of sobriety. Remember, "one day at a time". You can get there if you keep your goals simple. Tell yourself that you will "do what it takes" to stay clean today. Your progress in your CSA recovery is great news too. Sounds like your self-esteem is building and you are well on your way to your freedom.

Keep your head up and keep trying,

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#264984 - 12/03/08 01:26 AM . [Re: Trucker51]
bardo213 Offline
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Registered: 11/21/07
Posts: 811
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Edited by bardo213 (06/21/13 06:52 PM)

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#265008 - 12/03/08 07:52 AM Re: the past 4yrs.... [Re: bardo213]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
lynch,

I think you have a valid point that genetics plays a very large part in mental health problems such as anxiety,and chemical dependency.
Doing research into my families background on my mothers side.
My mother, grand mother, and greatgrandmother all had relative severe mental health problems. My ggmother I heard spent most of her adult life in a State Mental Health hospital in Michigan. My mother was in and of the hospital until she was given medication to control her mental health problems. my grandmother wouldnot go to see a doctor and nobody could be around for any lenght of time, so she spent most of her adult life alone. My uncle has had problems like myself with anxiety and depression and takes medication to control their severity.

On my fathers side there is a long of history of alcoholism and drug addiction.
After almost twenty years of soberity I will not touch any alcohol or drugs. I am not willing to risk playing with my old addictions and returning to that pattern of living that I have overcome. It was too painful and costly for me(emotionally,physically,financially, and legally) for me to risk playing with those old demons again.
Plus now I have legally precripted medication to deal with my anxiety and depression. So I no longer have to self
medicate.

I don,t feel AA is too far off the mark when they claim that alcoholism is a disease. But like alot of other diseases it can be controled with the right treatment. But as they say alcoholism is put a symptom of my disease and I learned from them to keep seaching for my problem. Which for me is a combination of a chemical inbalance in my body and the neglect,emotional and sexual abuse that I suffer as a child.

It has helped me to understand myself and to let go of the shame that I always had felt. That most of who I was and and the behaviors that I learned to cope with life were outside of my control. So it was not my fault.
It is possible from the things that I learned about myself to change the physical and behavioral aspects of my problems.
It is no longer outside of my control to do those things that will make me a healthier and happier person.

Mike

_________________________
To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

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#265044 - 12/03/08 01:33 PM . [Re: michael banks]
bardo213 Offline
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Registered: 11/21/07
Posts: 811
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Edited by bardo213 (06/21/13 06:53 PM)

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