I too believe in repressed memories. It is just a matter of faith, since I remember every ugly detail from the time it all began. It isnít difficult for me to see how more fortunate minds would bury these details.

By the same token, we are always looking for a scape goat. A way to forgive our own failings. Just as some memories are repressed, so also are some created in falsehood. We survivors donít like to admit that we are ourselves are some times less than honorable. On occasion our deceitful minds even fool themselves.

Memory is a frail creature, shaped as much by conceit as by events. It should be rigorously questioned in the light of honest and brutal self examination. Of course bad things happened. They should be openly acknowledged. Yet we, in our human failings, are often wrong. My mind is clouded by traumas from the past. It is not too much for me to accept the possibility that some of the details of my memory may have been manufactured by my flawed psyche in order to justify my personal faults.

I am not even all that impressionable and have no agenda beyond understanding the truth. That is why I can freely admit that not only is it possible for me to have mis-remembered, in fact I have intentionally lied. I have lied both to others and to myself. Creating a fantasy that suits my ego driven needs, I have come to accept that fantasy as a fact.

Maybe this admission makes me a small, imperfect creature. OK. I accept that judgment, and will remember it, for real!