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#264158 - 11/28/08 10:12 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: joelRT]
ttoon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/19/07
Posts: 977
It would be interesting to know though, how many "professionals" in the field read Andrew Vachss. As Burke and the "family" enact their form of justice.


:-)


Dave

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#264159 - 11/28/08 10:15 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: joelRT]
steveb121 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 01/02/01
Posts: 157
Loc: Swindon, UK
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#264160 - 11/28/08 10:18 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: steveb121]
ttoon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/19/07
Posts: 977
Steve,



Nooooooooo, really? You mean being a survivor for fifty years means our opinions matter too? Hmmm...better keep that quiet.

As if any statistic could not be read and or manipulated and or used to promote one's own agenda? Imagine that?


:-)


Dave

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#264161 - 11/28/08 10:21 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: ttoon]
steveb121 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 01/02/01
Posts: 157
Loc: Swindon, UK
.





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#264165 - 11/28/08 10:40 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: steveb121]
joelRT Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 09/11/08
Posts: 1357
Loc: Québec, Canada
Steve,

Thank you for the validation. It's my personal opinion that we, experts and professionals alike, need to come to a concensuss for a unified approach on the subject of male CSA. I feel that too often we are standing on different sides of the fence and shouting our knowledge back and forth at one another. In the ensuing cacaphony the message just gets lost.

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My Story 2
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#264167 - 11/28/08 10:45 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: joelRT]
steveb121 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 01/02/01
Posts: 157
Loc: Swindon, UK
.



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#264168 - 11/28/08 11:13 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: steveb121]
ttoon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/19/07
Posts: 977


So...hmmm? It might not be "all or nothing" thinking that invites us to attach responsibility to every priest as they defend the Catholic church. Since, the Catholic church has shown that it is church first, parishoner last. The movement, the momentum, their agenda is certainly more important than any insignificant collateral damage along the way. What are thousands of victims and their struggles when weighed against the millions that might certainly benefit?

Perhaps, throwing out the notion that sexual predators can be healed in an audience and population looking first for their own salvation might be like sitting down for the first visit with your therapist and them saying, "Okay. Let's talk about forgiveness. You need to forgive. To not let them have this power over you."

Or, maybe not!!!


:-)


Dave

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#264172 - 11/28/08 11:36 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: ttoon]
steveb121 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 01/02/01
Posts: 157
Loc: Swindon, UK
.





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#264173 - 11/28/08 11:37 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: joelRT]
jacobtk Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/08/03
Posts: 527
Originally Posted By: joelRT
Jacob,

Man I owe you an apology. I've been so busy trying to score points off you laugh


You were? That is the nicest attempt to score points I've ever seen. I wish other people were as polite about it, especially when I try to get local centers to provide more services to male victims.

I appreciate your support and kindness. I apologize if that seems somewhat distant, but I'm not good at this sort of thing.



Edited by jacobtk (11/29/08 03:15 AM)
Edit Reason: fix incomplete thought
_________________________
Every day I die again, and again I’m reborn/Every day I have to find the courage/To walk out into the street/With arms out/Got a love you can’t defeat/Neither down nor out/There’s nothing you have that I need/I can breathe/Breathe now - U2

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#264268 - 11/29/08 12:53 AM Re: Why do abusers abuse? [Re: jacobtk]
michael banks Offline


Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Jacob,

I think everybody deserves to be helped if they truely desire it.
But from my experence in AA every few people are able to remain in recovery for any lenght of period. Only the most determine people remain.

Mike

_________________________
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-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

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