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#263882 - 11/26/08 08:43 PM ...
St3v3n Offline


Registered: 11/26/08
Posts: 102
...


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#263922 - 11/26/08 11:35 PM Re: So damn vulnerable [Re: St3v3n]
1islandboy Online   content
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 860
Loc: washington
cool



Edited by 1islandboy (11/26/08 11:50 PM)
Edit Reason: accidental double posting
_________________________
Rise above the storm and you will find the sunshine ~ M.F. Fernandez

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#263925 - 11/26/08 11:41 PM Re: So damn vulnerable [Re: St3v3n]
1islandboy Online   content
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 860
Loc: washington
St3v3n,

First I would like to welcome you to MS.

2.5 yrs with a T sounds like you're headed the right direction.

As far as the puzzle (with missing pieces and progress are concerned) I have found reading (above all else)has helped me first to identify what I was even dealing with...(I was lost in the oblivion of drugs and alcohol).

Victims no longer/Speaking our truth/ and Beyond betrayal are just a few of my favorites.

island

_________________________
Rise above the storm and you will find the sunshine ~ M.F. Fernandez

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#263932 - 11/27/08 12:40 AM ... [Re: 1islandboy]
St3v3n Offline


Registered: 11/26/08
Posts: 102
...


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#264042 - 11/27/08 01:16 PM Re: So damn vulnerable [Re: St3v3n]
1islandboy Online   content
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 860
Loc: washington
St3v3n,

Personally,I wouldn't worry about perfect grammer, some of us like myself, are far removed from perfect english, and are quite prone to slang, and throwing in commas, with reckless abandon. (When I came to this site I couldn't even type).

Reading books helped me break through the shame and get me in touch with other trust issuse...

...It was like the author who wrote these books understands and relates to my issues.

I started to feel a much better sense of progress while working with my T. (having read this information first).


island

_________________________
Rise above the storm and you will find the sunshine ~ M.F. Fernandez

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#264315 - 11/29/08 12:21 PM Re: So damn vulnerable [Re: 1islandboy]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
St3v3n,

Welcome to MaleSurvivor. I'm sorry to hear about your abuse history but you've come to the right place. You'll find great resources and information online as well as others how have had similar experiences and aftermath. You aren't alone.

So glad you like your therapist, that's so important to recovery!

I know of another gay MaleSurvivor member in The Netherlands... Niels.

What I've found is for recovery, don't worry about your sexuality or sexual preferences. It is more important to heal your inner child and sort the abuse issues out first, and then see where your sexuality lies. As children, you can be trained to respond sexually to about anything, even objects, but that doesn't necessarily make that your sexual preference. Sometimes sorting out the past will reveal more about the present.

Glad you found us!

Peace and love,

Michael


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#264362 - 11/29/08 04:12 PM Re: So damn vulnerable [Re: M3]
Niels Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/07/05
Posts: 196
Yes welcome to MS. I hope you will find some good allies in your recovery process here.





Edited by Niels (12/10/08 07:59 AM)
Edit Reason: privacy-trust issues-post deleted
_________________________
I live in my own little world - but that is OK! - They know me here.

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#264370 - 11/29/08 04:39 PM Re: So damn vulnerable [Re: St3v3n]
joelRT Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 09/11/08
Posts: 1357
Loc: Québec, Canada
First let me join my voice to those of all the other guys and wish a warm welcome to MS. I hope that you too, as so many of us have, will find yourself at home here.
Originally Posted By: St3v3n
I started getting serious panic attacks when i was about 18 and began drinking because of it, i'd only dare to go out after a few beers.Ofcourse i needed more and more up untill it started to have a reverse effect and drinking triggered the panic attacks, luckily it did and i haven't had a drink in over 3 years now.
But going out is still very much a problem and public transportation is practicly impossible for me and crowded shopping malls and music venues are also very difficult.

I just wanted to pick up on what you said above. I'm a little surprised that you don't mention having been diagnosed by your therapist as having SPD (Social Phobia Disorder).

Please don't misunderstand me, OK? I am NOT a doctor. I am however a sufferrer of SPD and I think I know the symptoms when I hear them described. If, and I say if, you have a form SPD, it is treatable. My recommendation is to go to celexa.com and read what the site has to say about the condition.

You will either recognise yourself or you won't. But if you do, then that can open up a whole new avenue of healing and wellness for you.

_________________________
My Story 1
My Story 2
The longest journey we take is to self-discovery

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#264371 - 11/29/08 04:42 PM Re: So damn vulnerable [Re: St3v3n]
wes-b Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/17/07
Posts: 438
Loc: Western, Canada

Welcome my brother Steven,

you have made a wonderful decision in joining MS. As I hope you see in these replies. This place is full of love and support,
Originally Posted By: St3v3n
but this is all very vague, don't know if this makes any sense to any of you but it's like having a only a few pieces of a 5000 piece puzzle.St3v3n

Steven... that makes a lot of sense my friend. I am certain that you and I are not the only ones who feel a sense of vagueness about some or all of our abuse history. Part of it, IMHO, stems from wanting it not to be true and minimizing... I still want it to be a bad dream and when I wake up it's gone and never happened...

Stick around and pick up that which is helpful and leave that which is not... BTW, some of the stuff I don't want to pick up keeps getting put in front of me, my God knows what I need and when I listen he helps me pick up all of the things that I need.

:-)

Love,

Your Brother in healing, Wes

_________________________
Happy to be a recovering survivor. :-)

Continuing to meet more of my fellows as I "Trudge the Road of Happy Destiny".

My Story, 1st pass

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#264403 - 11/29/08 08:05 PM ... [Re: wes-b]
St3v3n Offline


Registered: 11/26/08
Posts: 102
...


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