***********SEVERE TRIGGER WARNING**************


I created the following two videos as a homework assignment from my T. I broke them up into two separate pieces for a few reasons, but mostly because the abuse years and the aftermath are two distinct eras in my life.

BE WARNED!!!! The first video is VERY ROUGH and DARK!!!!
It starts out timid and when the timer strikes 1:50, look out!
If you are not in a strong mode, do not watch Part 1.

Part 1 - A Childhood Changed:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1JROZascas

Part 2 - The Aftermath:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SM8m98ol0PQ

I have had some emails and PMs come back to me that folks have used these to show family members what they deal with/dealt with. This is especially true of The Aftermath.

If I try to find words for how I feel in this moment, I'll never shut up. I'm hyperventilating as I type this. How about using these clips as PSAs as opposed to that other tame, meaningless crap on the airwaves. Yeah, these clips hurt to watch, man, but then what is it they say? "The truth hurts" Yep!!!

Thanks so much for these. Robbie

Your fellow journeyman,
Joel

Joel, I'm glad you liked them (I realize "like" is not the right word here).

I offered them to one federally and privately funded org. They said "too graphic." My T is linking them to his website. But feel free to let other org know.

I couldn't do it.

Robbie, I'm still amazed by these videos. I hope you can take pride in accomplishing such a personal, powerful piece of art.

Peace and love...

Michael

Well Robbie, what did you expect that they'd say : Gee thanks for the kick in the nuts, let me spread wider so you can get a better shot?

Of course your vids are too graphic. So are the pictures that I have had in my head these last forty odd years - being on my hands and knees obeying compliantly as I was told to beg for it, 'cmon fairy boy lets here it, tells us how much you want it (forgive me if I gloss over the rest).

For all the lip service (no pun intended) paid out there to the plight of the harm done to our children, no one wants to be visited by it's reality in their living rooms. Its the PC thing to decry pedophilia, but get involved? get my hands dirty? Sorry, to busy!!!

Have you tried Oprah, oh, and I can't believe that I'm going to suggest this, DR Phil? (oh, now I want to wash my mouth out with soap) or how about that guy on Dateline NBC, you know the one, the guy that uses us to foster his career by lying to the American public that by nabbing a minuscule amout of pedophiles he's making our kids safer? OK, I'm being facesious, but all the same he could just be interested.

Keep knocking on doors Robbie, one will open!!!

Your fellow journeyman,
Joel

Geez, sorry Robbie, I'm back again. Has it occured to you to publish your vids in poem/photo booklet form? Perhaps then shcools may be interested or community health clinics/hospitals, crisis centers and the like. Just a thought. Man, I just can't get your vids outta ma head!!!

The first Vid just sort of stunned me, The second Hit ME in the gut. I am sitting here trying to see the keys through my tears. I feel the loneliness and despair I saw in this Vid. You did a great job. Just wish you didn't have to and that no one needed to see it. I'm sorry for all of US. Dave

Beyond powerful Rob

Marinan, I'm glad the trigger warning stopped you then.

Michael, I'm glad I made them too. I found them to be a great release of what I've always.

Joel, I can't wait to see what the folks at the church say - the ones whom rejected the idea of a men's trauma support group.

Davesc, Sorry it was a hard-hit, but I hope you can use this in some positive way.

Mogigo, Thank you for watching and approving.

Robbie:

Having seen the trigger warning I chose not to watch the first. I start my T today, in an hour and a half, and I want to make sure I actually get there.

The second video. O.M..G!!!Wow! That really hit me. I don't wish to sound jaded, but I have seen so many kids in pain pictures that I guess I sort of tune them out. But to see MEN in pain pictures. Yeah! Men feel pain, sorrow, anguish shame and all the rest. To see it portrayed so well and tastefully. Well done. I feel as if you represented me very well. Right on!!! (That's the ol'hippy in me coming out!)