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#261977 - 11/16/08 01:44 AM Suicide
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
Just after midnight I lost contact with him.. cry ..and I fear the worst. I've been in touch with the police.. but now I just have to wait and try to function with this overwhelming grief.

I just had to put that out there.. thanks for reading.


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#262008 - 11/16/08 04:39 AM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
MissMyra Offline


Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 19
Loc: UK
(((((Melancholy)))))

That is really terrible, I'm so, so, sorry... but you don't know anything for sure yet, so please don't give up hope just yet. You did the right thing by contacting the police.

Please take care of yourself. PM me if you like.

You'll both be in my thoughts. I really hope it'll all be ok.


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#262035 - 11/16/08 11:33 AM Re: Suicide [Re: MissMyra]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
I'm trying to hang onto that sliver of hope, but as the hours pass I'm less and less hopeful.

It's so difficult, so overwhelming.. I don't know what to do.


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#262049 - 11/16/08 12:52 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
riz Offline


Registered: 10/07/08
Posts: 123
hi melancholy,

i'm afraid i don't have any wise words for you, but i wanted you to know that another person is with you and praying for you and your loved one, hoping to send you a little more strength to make it through such a gut wrenching situation.

love,
riz


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#262058 - 11/16/08 02:17 PM Re: Suicide [Re: riz]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
Thank you Riz,

It's so difficult, and having to rely soley on police work isn't reassuring. I do not have any contact information for his family, so seems harder.. not having them to reach out to.


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#262063 - 11/16/08 03:00 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
wes-b Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/17/07
Posts: 438
Loc: Western, Canada

*supportive hug* my prayers are en route.

_________________________
Happy to be a recovering survivor. :-)

Continuing to meet more of my fellows as I "Trudge the Road of Happy Destiny".

My Story, 1st pass

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#262082 - 11/16/08 05:11 PM Re: Suicide [Re: wes-b]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
Thank you wes-b, they are very much appreciated.


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#262124 - 11/16/08 09:00 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
riz Offline


Registered: 10/07/08
Posts: 123
melancholy,

how are you doing? any news? do you have any family or friends that know about this that can offer any support?

riz


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#262125 - 11/16/08 09:05 PM Re: Suicide [Re: riz]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
I'm surviving, a wreck.. but I'm still here. I haven't heard anything, and I guess the cell phone on his battery finally gave out.. because all calls are just going directly to voicemail. frown

I've been on the phone with various police departments, but nothing solid.. and of course, since I'm not directly related they can't promise me any sort of response even if they do find something out.

The family knows of me, but I don't know if they know how to get in touch with me.. or if they even would.

I'm supposed to speak with a dectective tomorrow morning, so hopefully that yields some sort of hope.

Thank you for your concern riz.


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#262198 - 11/17/08 06:48 AM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
soapy bubbles Offline
Member

Registered: 09/05/06
Posts: 332
Loc: london
I've been through what you're going through.
PM me if you'd like to.
Thinking of you.
SB

_________________________
"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.” --- Eleanor Roosevelt

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#262411 - 11/18/08 02:22 AM Re: Suicide [Re: soapy bubbles]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
Thank you soapy bubbles, I'm heading to bed shortly.. but I may just PM you in the morning. I appreciate your thoughts.

Still nothing.. frown


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#262640 - 11/19/08 07:41 AM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
riz Offline


Registered: 10/07/08
Posts: 123
how's it going, melancholy?

riz


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#262812 - 11/20/08 12:43 AM Re: Suicide [Re: riz]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
Just trying to get through each day. It seems the more information I try to find, the more confusing things seems. I don't really know what to think anymore.

Doing a lot of writing, to keep track of things.. and a lot of waiting and thinking. frown


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#262813 - 11/20/08 01:09 AM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
CorDav Offline


Registered: 11/03/08
Posts: 35
Loc: Ontario, Canada
I am unable to process this stuff alone. It is only in the reaching out to others that helps get me going in a healthy direction of recovery and hope. I am new here and in weeks It has changed

_________________________
"you can be a character and still not have any" the fox Pulp Fiction
Rule 62: Quit taking yourself so serious.
Pinky "Gee Brain, what do you want to do tonight?" Brain: "The same thing we do every night, Pinky- try to take over the world."

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#262880 - 11/20/08 12:42 PM Re: Suicide [Re: CorDav]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
I don't know that anyone can process this type of situation on their own. I do have family and friends to turn to, and I think that's what is keeping me afloat right now.

All of the questions and serious lack of answers torment me daily. I'm scared that the initial shock is starting to wear off and I don't know what that's going to me for my mental wellbeing.


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#263329 - 11/23/08 12:58 AM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
It's been just over a week.. 50 minutes and a week since I've last heard anything.

I just feel so numb. frown


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#264644 - 12/01/08 01:47 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
I just got a phone call.. he's gone. My beautiful heart is gone. cry


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#264663 - 12/01/08 03:51 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
MemoryVault Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/01/07
Posts: 693
Loc: NJ
I'm so sorry, Melancholy.

No words anyone can say will be enough. But it wasn't your fault. And please do whatever you need to take care of yourself and get support.

David


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#264667 - 12/01/08 03:59 PM Re: Suicide [Re: MemoryVault]
Geeders Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/03/08
Posts: 1901
Loc: Peterborough, Ontario, Canada
Dear Melancholy:

I have been following this for a while, and although I haven't wanted to barge in during a time of unbearable waiting, I would like now to let you know you have been in my thoughts, and hope that you have supports nearby. My heart goes out to you for your loss. Take care.

Jim

_________________________
My name is Jim
WoR Mysthaven 2008, Level 2 WoR Alta 2009, Kirkridge 2010, 2011, Oprah 200 men

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#264825 - 12/01/08 11:10 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Geeders]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
Thank you both, I appreciate the kind words.

The logical side of my mind understands some things, but it's so difficult to align the emotional side with it. The conflict is so remarkably difficult. Everything seems so surreal and so many things don't make sense.. it's difficult to discern true gut instinct from denial.

I'm grateful to the support I have from family, friends.. and you all here. Thank you so much.


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#264829 - 12/01/08 11:22 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11138
Loc: Denver, CO
Melancholy, that is just awful. So sorry. frown

_________________________
List of things ain't nobody got time for:

1. That


If I could meet myself as a boy...

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#264834 - 12/02/08 12:12 AM Re: Suicide [Re: FormerTexan]
Barkabus Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 809
I am so terribly sorry Melancholy. This is a horrible tragedy. Damn, I'm so sorry frown

_________________________
My Story

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#264849 - 12/02/08 06:25 AM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
MissMyra Offline


Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 19
Loc: UK
Dear Mel,

I'm so, so sorry to hear this.

There are few words that I can offer, but I agree with what's been said before. As terrible as this is, please remember that this was *his* act, and not your fault.

Just know that you are in my thoughts.

(((((((Mel)))))))


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#264884 - 12/02/08 02:25 PM Re: Suicide [Re: MissMyra]
Melancholy Offline


Registered: 10/21/08
Posts: 19
Loc: Canada
Thank you all, even though your words don't change what's happened, they mean a lot to me.

Today I feel very flat, and I wonder if this is what acceptance feels like.

It truly is one day at a time.


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#264898 - 12/02/08 04:59 PM Re: Suicide [Re: Melancholy]
dgoods Offline
Guest

Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 622
Loc: Richmond area
My deepest sympathies.
If you ever need an ear, or just a shoulder, don't hesitate.

_________________________
Give sorrow words: the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.

-William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act IV, Sc. III

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